CLAWSON, MICHIGAN – Week 11 was the final tune-up prior to the 2022 Singles Tournament, and seven guys took advantage of the opportunity at JV’s house.

All seven players are also scheduled to participate in the Singles Tournament, and each one of the guys seemed to have extra focus on this night, working on tweaking and perfecting throwing mechanics in advance of the Singles Tournament. The heightened attention yielded some of the best group results of the season.

All seven players finished at or above a 15.3 KPM. KP paced the field with a 19.7, but most notable was Galz posting a 17.6 KPM. Galz is a perennial top five player in this league, but the 2022 season has been a bit of a struggle for him. Coming into tonight he ranked #14 in the Power Rankings with a 12.7 KPM, 4.1 points per round (ppr), 61% accuracy and 0.82 cornholes per round, all of which are the lowest of his career, excluding his rookie season in 2018.

Although his strong night didn’t cause a huge jump in the Power Rankings (he moved from 14 to 13), it does create a lot of optimist as he enters the Singles Tournament, where he’s a two-time runner-up. Knowing Galz, that son of a bitch has been sandbagging all season and is waiting in the weeds to pop up Saturday and bite someone.

GAME OF THE NIGHT

This week’s Game of the Night pitted JV and Brent against Erik and Nick. Early on, Erik and Nick were giving their opponents the business, racing out to a 10 – 0 lead. Nick scored six points against Brent during that stretch, while Erik chipped in another four points against JV.

JV quieted the storm in the top of the third inning with four points, but Nick immediately added two more points in the bottom of the inning, making it 12 – 4.

As we’ve seen countless times, no lead should ever be considered comfortable or safe. Nick and Erik’s lead in this game was no different. In the fourth inning, JV scored two points followed by five from Brent and in the blink of an eye their deficit shrunk to 12 – 11.

The duo extended their scoring run to 13 unanswered points when JV pounded Erik in the fifth inning, 7 – 1, giving his squad a 17 – 12 lead.

Nick rebounded nicely in the bottom of the inning by scoring four precious points to keep his team in the game, down just 17 – 16.

In the top of the sixth inning, Erik had an opportunity to win the game. He possessed a 7 – 5 lead after three bags and a cornhole would give him a 10 – 5 lead in the round. Those five points would’ve been enough to earn a victory, pending JV missed his final bag off the board. None of those scenarios mattered, though, because Erik only boarded his final bag. JV did miss, rubbing a little salt in the missed opportunity wound. Still, Erik gave his team a 19 – 17 lead by winning the round, 8 – 5.

The bags flipped to Nick and Brent, both of whom are players who want late game opportunities like this. However, both players looked as though the moment overwhelmed them a bit. They combined for just 10 points in the round, with Brent snagging a 6 – 4 advantage, knotting the game at 19 – 19.

Here we were again, bags in JV’s hands with an opportunity to clinch a win. A similar opportunity presented itself in last week’s Game of the Night, but Erik withstood that challenge and closed the game by getting the best of JV. Both players held firm in this game, playing the round with superb strategy and washing the round at 7 – 7. The missed bag from both JV and Erik was an aggressive cut shot (Erik) and an airmail attempt over two blockers (JV).

Back at the other end, Nick and Brent had a shot at redemption after crapping the bed with the game on the line in the last inning. Brent applied pressure with a first bag cornhole, followed by a front-board miss from Nick. Brent’s second bag was also a cornhole, giving him a 6 – 0 lead in the round. Nick drained a much-needed cornhole on his second bag.

Brent’s third bag was a block, the perfect shot under the circumstances. Nick nestled his third bag behind Brent’s, creating a two bag pile.

Brent attempted to push the pile on his final throw, rather than board it to take an 8 – 4 lead and force Nick to airmail or push the pile just to limit damage and extend the game. He was wide of the target and had too much heat on the bag, missing off the board. Nick still had to be in the hole on his final throw, but now an airmail would wash the round at 7 – 7, or pushing the entire pile would wash the round at 9 – 9. He opted to stay skinny and hard up the middle, something his wife has never seen in her life. He rammed the pile, but not hard enough because all three bags sat on the rim of the hole. The round finished in favor of Brent, 7 – 5, which was good enough for a 21 – 19 comeback victory.

The comeback was the first of the season for both Brent and JV, while also handing Nick his second “choke” of the season and Erik his first of the season.

MUSHROOM STAMP MOMENT

In Game 5, Galz and Erik had a 16 – 13 lead over Brent and JV. The bags were in Erik and JV’s hands, which is becoming a common head-to-head match-up producing late-game heroics.

In recent weeks, Erik is the chink in JV’s closing armor. For the second consecutive week, Erik was unfazed by JV’s closing prowess, taking the fight right to him by draining three cornholes on his way to a 9 – 2 win in the round, giving his team a 21 – 13 victory. JV rarely blows saves, especially in such blowout fashion. But Erik has his number lately, which is blossoming into an entertaining rivalry.

Congratulations to Erik for earning this week’s MSM!

NEWS AND NOTES

• As mentioned earlier, KP finished with a 19.7 KPM. His 83% accuracy helped him score 6.2 points per round and 1.45 cornholes per round. Despite the numbers, he finished with a 0.500 record, 3 – 3.
• Nick ended the night with an 18.8 KPM, 5.9 ppr, 74% accuracy, 1.45 cornholes per round, and 2 – 3 record.
• Brent posted an 18.7 KPM, 5.9 ppr, 80% accuracy, 1.36 cornholes per round, and a stellar 5 – 1 record.
• JV finished with a 15.6 KPM, 4.9 ppr, 64% accuracy, 1.17 cornholes per round, and 3 – 2 record.
• Dan posted a 15.3 KPM, 4.9 ppr, 71% accuracy, 1.02 cornholes per round, and 4 – 3 record.
• Erik’s numbers mirrored Dan’s in many ways – 15.3 KPM, 4.9 ppr, 72% accuracy, 1.02 cornholes per round, and 3 – 6 record.

CLAWSON, MICHIGAN – Action returned to Dibble’s house for week 10, which is always filled with phenomenal food, a great atmosphere, and a helluva time. This week, though, Mother Nature decided to add a wrinkle by dropping a monsoon on us.

We successfully completed two games before a long rain delay pushed us into the garage for cover. Once in the garage, drinks flowed, shots were ripped and non-stop laughter ensued.

After an hour, the sky cleared and JV and KP used leaf blowers to dry the court so cornhole could continue.

The hour of excessive drinking in the garage was immediately evident. It was as if the guys couldn’t play a competitive game to save their lives (though individual level of play remained high). Of the 12 total games played, 10 were decided by 10 points or more, and three of the blowouts were bun runs, including back-to-back in games 6 and 7.

• Game 6 – Not the Real Dan and Bushie teamed up against JV and Not the Real Scott. Bushie tallied one point in the top of the first inning against JV, while Not the Real Dan added five more points in the bottom of the first. In the second inning, those two combined for nine more points to make the score 15 – 0. Bushie ended all hope when he hit a two bag drag on his final throw to score a 9 – 2 advantage in the top of the third inning, winning the game 21 – 0. It was a sick shot to secure the victory, one worthy of a Mushroom Stamp Moment.
• Game 7 – Nick and Brent formed a super team against Not the Real Dan and Bushie. This one had the look of a bun run on paper, and that’s exactly how it unfolded. Brent hit Not the Real Dan with a 9 – 1 round to start the game. Nick piled on with a 7 – 3 advantage over Bushie, followed by three more points from Brent to make it 15 – 0. Nick finished the job in the bottom of the second inning with a 4-bagger and 12 – 6 win over Bushie, capping the game at 21 – 0.
• Game 11 – JV was mad as hell about his earlier bun run and wanted to take it out on someone. His newest enemy is Nick – he ALWAYS wants a piece of him. So, he summoned Nick to the court and requested KP and Not the Real Dan to join. Nick was feeling froggy after being called out, so he leaped and snagged Not the Real Dan as his partner, clearly wanting to stick it to JV by winning as an underdog. That plan didn’t work out so well. Nick joined the bun run crew and Not the Real Dan earned his second bun run of the night. JV outscored Nick head-to-head 18 – 8, while KP bested Not the Real Dan 19 – 8, and the bun run was complete in just three innings.

Not the Real Dan (twice), Not the Real Scott, JV, Bushie and Nick all lined up together and did naked suicides in Dibble’s driveway. If you’ve never played basketball, a suicide is where you sprint the length of the court and back, touching various lines along the way. The five-man bun run was a LEG original, and let’s just say it won’t be forgotten any time soon.

As the boys were finishing their naked sprints, Mother Nature thought it would be even funnier by unloading rain to moisten their naked bodies. I’m glad she laughed, because everyone else in attendance looked for the puke bucket.

Not the Real Dan, aided by a BAC north of 0.20, flashed back to his days as a Marine and got dressed in the rain, deciding only to put shorts back on. LEG doesn’t have a no shirt, no shoes, no service policy, so the games continued in down-pouring rain. Eventually Brent took his shirt off, KP took his shoes and shorts off (he’s fat, so he kept his shirt on), and a few other brave souls stepped out to soak themselves for a few more games (click here for video of the rain action: https://youtube.com/shorts/lxnTtUcGMfo?feature=share)

Only at Dibble’s house!

GAME OF THE NIGHT

Because there were so many blowouts, the Game of the Night wasn’t difficult to choose this week. In game 8 Dibble and Erik took on Brent and JV. At first, this appeared to be on the verge of a third straight bun run (as mentioned earlier, games 6 and 7 were bun runs) with Dibble and Erik building a 13 – 2 lead thanks to hot starts from both players.

In the fifth inning Brent gave his team some traction with a 4-bagger, snagging three points over Dibble. JV tacked on three more points in the bottom of the inning, cutting their deficit to 13 – 8.

Brent earned three more points in the sixth inning, while Erik scored one to give his squad a 14 – 11 lead. Dibble dropped a 10-point round on Brent in the seventh inning, but that was good for only one point because Brent hung tough with a 9-point round. 15 – 11 in favor of Dibble and Erik.

In the bottom of the seventh, JV got red hot and sank three cornholes on his way to a 10 – 4 advantage, giving his team a 17 – 15 lead. An early blowout suddenly looked like a choke/comeback.

Dibble scored his second straight 10-point round in the eighth inning (10 – 7 over Brent) to take the lead back, 18 – 17. In the bottom of the eighth JV was poised to close the game out after Erik’s first bag landed on the board but out of play, serving as a bumper. JV promptly drained a cornhole with his first bag. Erik responded, using his bumper to perfection for a cornhole. JV’s second bag scored, but was out of play as another bumper on the left side of the board. They were even, 4 – 4 after two bags each.

Erik split the bumpers for a third bag cornhole. JV looked unusually tense when releasing his third bag, which landed short and left for one point.

Erik stayed down the middle on his final bag for a cornhole, taking a 10 – 5 lead in the round. JV’s final bag had to be in the hole to extend the game. It was clear he didn’t trust a slide shot with stickier than normal board conditions, so he reverted back to his usual short airmail throw – high, landing a few inches before the hole and creeping in. He threw it well, likely expecting the humid boards to hold the bag’s path. Instead, his bag hydroplaned upon hitting the board and flew off the back of the board.

Game over. A 21 – 17 win for Erik and Dibble.

Despite the slow start for Brent and JV, they recovered nicely to push Dibble and Erik to the limit. This was a phenomenal game to watch, with all players balling out.

• Dibble ended the game with 62 gross points and 18 cornholes, averaging 7.75 points per round
• Erik ended the game with 47 gross points and 11 cornholes, averaging 5.9 points per round
• Brent ended the game with 58 gross points and 16 cornholes, averaging 7.25 points per round
• JV ended the game with 45 gross points and 11 cornholes, averaging 5.6 points per round

Erik’s 10-point round to clinch the game earns this week’s Mushroom Stamp Moment, particularly because he was down 3 – 1 after one bag against the best closer in the league. Rebounding with three straight cornholes to score a 10-point round and hold-off JV is big time. Congratulations to Erik for this week’s MSM!

NEWS AND NOTES

• Erik had a great week with an 18.2 KPM and 2 – 0 record while averaging 5.7 ppr, 75% accuracy and 1.36 cornholes per round
• Dibble overcame the normal “host curse,” playing very well. His 20.1 KPM was his highest since week 4, helping him to a 4 – 2 record. Dibble averaged 6.3 ppr, 76% accuracy and 1.60 cornholes per round
• Brent wins weirdest stat of the week. His 21.5 KPM is fantastic, yet it didn’t produce victories. He finished with a 2 – 3 record despite posting excellent numbers – 6.7 ppr, 83% accuracy and 1.70 cornholes per round
• JV continues to look more and more like his old self while battling through new mechanics, this week with a 15.1 KPM, 4.8 ppr, 67% accuracy and 1.06 cornholes per round
• Bushie finished 4 – 3 with a 16.3 KPM, 5.1 ppr, 66% accuracy and 1.23 cornholes per round
• I’m pretty sure Justin Timberlake wrote, “Mirrors” for KP and Nick – “It’s like you’re my mirror! My mirror staring back at me!” Both players threw a 21.3 KPM and averaged 6.6 ppr. Nick was slightly more accurate (77% vs. 76%) while KP sank a fraction more cornholes per round (1.76 vs. 1.75). For the entire season, the story is the same: KPM – Nick 19.3 vs. KP 19.0; points per round – Nick 6.0 vs. KP 5.9; accuracy – Nick 78% vs. KP 75%; cornholes per round – Nick 1.46 vs. KP 1.46; and head-to-head points for the entire season – Nick 270 vs. KP 264

CLAWSON, MICHIGAN – For the first time since June 20, 2020, cornhole returned to Coach Mike’s house in Clawson. It has been 25 months since Coach last hosted an event, but that event was monumental – it was the 2020 Preseason Kick-Off, which broke COVID-19 and quarantine protocols to bring this crew of flunkies together for some much needed debauchery.

Twenty-five months ago COVID-19 was raging, Tiger King was the rave of Netflix, and DaBaby had the #1 spot on the Billboard 100 locked down with his hit, “Rockstar”.

Hold on guys, Bushie just took a break from yelling at the clouds, “Who is the baby and why is it a Rockstar?”. No Bushie, it’s DaBaby, and that song meets the beats per minute and number of drops necessary to be called “a banger”.

The last event at Coach’s house was a phenomenal bash, and as you’d expect, this one was no different. Whether it was because we played at Coach’s house, which is always an enticing draw, or whether it was Jack’s farewell tour before he moves to Chicago, everyone came out of the woodwork to hang and play. 14 guys were there, and most showed up early and stayed late. Hell, Steve-O showed up on a Thursday! Tony came out of retirement! There were bitches in the living room getting it on, and we weren’t leaving ‘til six in the mornin’!

GAME OF THE NIGHT

This week’s Game of the Night featured the 1980s MSU stone-washed jeans crew, plus Mr. Cocksucker. Since some of you don’t know what that means – Tony and Bushie paired up against Steve-O and Nick.

Honestly, it’s amazing this game qualified for Game of the Night considering at least 50% of the participants were high as a kite.

Despite substance abuse, this was a well-played game. After three innings the score was tied 9 – 9, and Bushie held firm against Nick, giving up just one net point (Bushie scored three on Nick, while giving up four points). Bushie averaged 6 points per round through three innings, while Nick averaged 6.3 points per round. The majority of the damage was done at the opposite end of the boards with Steve-O and Tony taking turns with big scoring rounds.

The damn broke in the fourth inning, where Nick scored six points on Bushie and Steve-O added another against Tony, making it 16 – 9. They pushed the lead to 18 – 9 after the fifth inning, and inched closer to victory after the top of the sixth inning, 20 – 9.

Somehow Nick only managed two points in the bottom of the sixth inning, yet Bushie couldn’t capitalize, scoring only three points. At least Bushie kept his squad alive, 20 – 10.

After a 4 – 4 wash in the top of the seventh inning, Bushie conjured all his internal rage and dropped the hammer on Nick – a 10 – 4 round to close his team’s deficit to 20 – 16!

The bags flipped to Tony and Steve-O. Gramps – Tony’s nickname…like I said, he came out of retirement – alleviated the stiffness in his back just long enough to drain his first three bags. Meanwhile, Steve-O’s cleanse hurt him at the worst time, hunger pangs for 50 mg edibles derailed his focus. He conceded an enormous round, making only one bag on the board. Tony had an opportunity for a 4-bagger on his last throw, even though the game was over, and missed because of too much heat on the bag.

No matter, his 9 – 1 round completed his team’s 20 – 9 comeback and handed Steve-O and Nick a “choke”. That game-clinching round also earns Tony this week’s Mushroom Stamp Moment. Congrats, Gramps! Like Ric Flair, it’s back to retirement. But it was great to see you!

NEWS AND NOTES

• Jack Daddy ended his 2022 season on the highest of notes, finishing with a 3 – 1 record. His 10.3 KPM isn’t his best, but it’s negatively impacted by the fact he made just 0.50 cornholes per round. His 61% accuracy was solid, especially given the conditions, which were extremely difficult for all players this week. The wind was swirling, but I also believe the unfamiliar sightlines caused players trouble. Regardless, Jack leaves us on a winning note and we only hope that this moment represents the end of a season, not the end of a career.

Jack, from all of us, we will miss you and prefer you to be local so we can spend more time together, more frequently. But, we understand this opportunity for you and your girl, and wish you both the best as you move to Chicago. Just two rules – 1) STAY IN TOUCH and 2) Please don’t become a Chicago sports fan!

We love you, brother, and will miss you dearly.

• As for the rest, I’m just going to post individual stats for quick browsing. Thank you to Coach for being such a gracious, amazing host (like always). Hell of a week, fellas.
• Nick – 19.7 KPM, 3 – 4 record, 6.2 points per round, 1.47 cornholes per round and 82% accuracy
• Turley – 18.5 KPM, 3 – 3 record, 5.8 points per round, 1.42 cornholes per round and 73% accuracy
• KP – 18.2 KPM, 5 – 2 record, 5.7 points per round, 1.39 cornholes per round and 73% accuracy
• Barker – 17.7 KPM, 2 – 0 record, 5.5 points per round, 1.36 cornholes per round and 70% accuracy
• Brent – 16.9 KPM, 4 – 2 record, 5.3 points per round, 1.31 cornholes per round and 66% accuracy
• Dibble – 14.9 KPM, 3 – 2 record, 4.7 points per round, 1.1 cornholes per round and 63% accuracy
• Tony – 13.5 KPM, 2 – 3 record, 4.3 points per round, 0.89 cornholes per round and 63% accuracy
• Bob – 12.5 KPM, 2 – 3 record, 3.9 points per round, 0.94 cornholes per round and 51% accuracy
• Bushie – 12.3 KPM, 3 – 4 record, 3.9 points per round, 0.88 cornholes per round and 53% accuracy
• Steve – O – 11.1 KPM, 1 – 6 record, 3.6 points per round, 0.74 cornholes per round and 52% accuracy
• Jack – 10.3 KPM, 3 – 1 record, 3.4 points per round, 0.50 cornholes per round and 61% accuracy
• Coach Mike – 9.3 KPM, 2 – 3 record, 3.0 points per round, 0.60 cornholes per round and 45% accuracy

BEVERLY HILLS, MICHIGAN – Last week we talked about the two new rookies, and their “welcome to the league moments”. What a difference one week makes – both players looked more comfortable on the boards, allowing their talent to shine.

Pete made a huge move in the Power Rankings, jumping from #16 last week to #11 this week. He threw a 14.9 KPM with 4.7 points per round, 1.04 cornholes per round and 66% accuracy. He was also impressive in his head-to-head match-ups this week, winning every single head-to-head match-up in all seven games he played, and obviously winning the aggregate head-to-head as well.

• Beat Turley head-to-head, 38 – 34 (one game)
• Beat Dan head-to-head, 113 – 105 (three games)
• Beat JV head-to-head, 17 – 11 (one game)
• Beat Bob head-to-head, 68 – 44 (two games)

Pete finished with a 3 – 4 record, but clearly did his part in all seven of those games. Pete has phenomenal mechanics, with one of the flattest bags in the league and a deadly airmail. As he gains more experience, Pete could easily become a perennial top five player in the league.

The other dynamic rookie, Dan, may have stayed at #8 in the Power Rankings, but his KPM jumped from 14.7 last week to 16.0 this week (he’s at 15.5 overall on the season). The rest of his numbers increased nicely week-over-week, as well:

• Points Per Round – 5.1 this week vs. 4.8 last week
• Cornholes Per Round – 1.07 this week vs. 0.84 last week
• Accuracy – 75% this week vs. 79% last week

Dan’s accuracy dropped a bit, but that’s a small sacrifice for seeing the bag go in the hole more often and to score more points every round.

It’s going to be difficult for either of these two to overcome the Rookie of the Year advantage Brent has, simply because of his Preseason Kick-Off Tournament championship and 18.5 KPM so far this season. However, both of these guys are capable of winning the Postseason Tournament and it wouldn’t be surprising to see them make noise in the Singles Tournament. If either guy has impressive runs in the final two tournaments of the year, it’s possible they leap to the front of the Rookie of the Year race.

GAME OF THE NIGHT

This may sound like a broken record week after week, but choosing this week’s Game of the Night was almost impossible. Of the 14 games played this week, nine were decided by six points or less and seven were decided by three points or less. Read that again – seven of 14 games were played to a score of 21 – 18 or closer. That’s unbelievable! For that reason, this week’s Game of the Night is a nod to all the close games – we’ll briefly recap and highlight all seven games decided by three points or less. Let’s dive in!

• Game 2 – Turley and Nick vs. JV and KP
  • Score: Turley and Nick win 21 – 20
  • Recap: Turley and Nick found themselves down 8 – 0 and 20 – 15, yet battled back to take this one. Nick weathered storms of 10 – 7 and 12 – 9 in the sixth and seventh innings against KP, which made the score 20 – 15 in favor of JV and KP. In the eighth inning, Turley tied it at 20 – 20 with an 8 – 3 round over JV, then Nick scored the final point in the bottom half of the inning to secure victory.
  • Stats: Turley scored 41 points and 8 cornholes, averaging 5.13 points per round, while JV scored 38 points and 9 cornholes, averaging 4.8 points per round. At the other end of the boards, Nick scored 46 points and 12 cornholes, averaging 5.8 points per round, while KP scored 47 points and 13 cornholes, averaging 5.9 points per round.
• Game 3 – Dan and JV vs. Pete and Bob
  • Score: Dan and JV win 21 – 20
  • Recap: This game was TIGHT every round through the middle stages of the game, with Pete and Bob ahead 11 – 10 after five innings. In the sixth inning, Bob blew the lid off the game with an 8 – 1 round over JV, making the score 18 – 10. Pete added another point in the top of the seventh inning, making it 19 – 10. JV then ignited a rally with four points in the bottom of the seventh, 19 – 14. The teams traded points in the eighth, making it 20 – 15, and just like the previous game, you didn’t want to be the team with a 20 – 15 lead. Dan closed it to 20 – 19 with an 8 – 4 round, and Mr. Closer (JV) did his thing, outscoring Bob 4 – 2 to clinch the game, 21 – 20.
  • Stats: Dan scored 34 points and 4 cornholes, averaging 3.8 points per round, while Pete scored 35 points and 7 cornholes, averaging 3.9 points per round. At the other end of the boards, JV scored 44 points and 10 cornholes, averaging 4.9 points per round, while Bob scored 42 points and 10 cornholes, averaging 4.7 points per round.
• Game 6 – Pete and Turley vs. Dan and Nick
  • Score: Dan and Nick win 21 – 18
  • Recap: This game was absurd. Pete and Turley raced to a 13 – 0 lead after just two innings, but Dan and Nick hung tough mentally and pieced together a 14 – 2 run over the next four innings, making the score 15 – 14 in favor of Pete and Turley. Across the next three innings, the teams exchanged points in a nip-and-tuck battle. The score was 18 – 17 in favor of Pete and Turley. In the 10^th inning, Pete and Dan played to a 10 – 10 wash, neither player willing to give an inch down. Nick threw fire in his half of the 10^th inning, draining three cornholes and building immense pressure on Turley. Turley managed just five points, including missing his final bag off the board to lose the round, 9 – 5, and the game, 21 – 18. For those scoring at home, losing that 13 – 0 early lead represents a choke for Pete and Turley, and a comeback for Dan and Nick.
  • Stats: Pete scored 54 points and 11 cornholes, averaging 5.4 points per round, while Dan scored 49 points and 11 cornholes, averaging 4.9 points per round. At the other end of the boards, Turley scored 52 points and 12 cornholes, averaging 5.2 points per round, while Nick scored 60 points and 14 cornholes, averaging 6.0 points per round.
• Game 8 – KP and Turley vs. Bob and Pete
  • Score: KP and Turley win 21 – 20
  • Recap: This game was tied at 6 – 6, then 11 – 11, then 18 – 18. Bob scored two points on KP to inch closer to victory, 20 – 18. Turley made it 20 – 19, but couldn’t quite find the hole enough to win the game. In the top of the eight, KP blocked the board with his first two bags, making life difficult for Bob. KP’s third bag pushed through blockers and into the hole, giving him a 5 – 2 lead through three bags. Bob scored his final bag on the board to cut the round deficit to 5 – 3, but that allowed KP to simply board his final bag for the win. He did, giving his team a 21 – 20 victory.
  • Stats: KP scored 34 points and 6 cornholes, averaging 4.3 points per round, while Bob scored 28 points and 3 cornholes, averaging 3.5 points per round. At the other end of the boards, Turley scored 34 points and 8 cornholes, averaging 4.9 points per round, while Pete scored 38 points and 9 cornholes, averaging 5.4 points per round.
• Game 10 – KP and Nick vs. Dan and Turley
  • Score: KP and Nick win 21 – 18
  • Recap: Dan and Turley had an 18 – 10 lead, then survived a 12-point round from Nick (Turley scored 10 to limit the damage to two points) and an 8-point round from KP (Dan scored 7 to limit the damage to one point). With the score 18 – 13, Nick closed the deficit to 18 – 15 before handing the bags to KP, who closed the game with a 10-point round. KP sank three cornholes on his way to a 10 – 4 win, giving he and Nick a 21 – 18 win.
  • Stats: KP scored 36 points and 10 cornholes, averaging 7.2 points per round, while Dan scored 32 points and 8 cornholes, averaging 6.4 points per round. At the other end of the boards, Nick scored 30 points and 8 cornholes, averaging 6.0 points per round, while Turley scored 31 points and 8 cornholes, averaging 6.2 points per round.
• Game 12 – KP and Turley vs. Dan and Bob
  • Score: KP and Turley win 21 – 18
  • Recap: The two head-to-head match-ups were quite interesting, with Dan absolutely working KP at one end and Turley destroying Bob at the other end. Dan and Bob held a late 17 – 12 lead before KP and Turley produced an 8 – 0 burst in one inning to take a 20 – 17 lead. Dan won the next round against KP, 7 – 6, keeping his team in the game (20 – 18). But similar to Game 8, Bob struggled in a clutch moment with the game on the line, scoring zero bags while Turley scored three points to win the game, 21 – 18.
  • Stats: KP scored 47 points and 8 cornholes, averaging 4.7 points per round, while Dan scored 56 points and 15 cornholes, averaging 5.6 points per round. At the other end of the boards, Turley scored 50 points and 9 cornholes, averaging 5.0 points per round, while Bob scored 36 points and 7 cornholes, averaging 3.6 points per round.
• Game 13 – Turley and Nick vs. Dan and KP
  • Score: Turley and Nick win 21 – 18
  • Recap: Turley and Nick almost choked this game away. They were up 14 – 0 through three and a half innings, then KP provided the spark his team needed with an enormous four-bagger against Nick to win the round 12 – 1. Suddenly, the game was 14 – 11. Nick responded nicely with rounds of 10 – 7 in the next two innings to put his team on 20 points. Dan held off Turley during that stretch by scoring four of his own points. The game was 20 – 15. Dan and KP cut it to 20 – 18 with three total points in the seventh inning, but couldn’t overcome the early hole they found themselves in. Nick held off KP in the eighth inning, scoring three points to win the game (he won the round 6 – 3 after KP tried to muddy the board and then failed to push any bags in on his final throw).
  • Stats: Turley scored 43 points and 9 cornholes, averaging 6.14 points per round, while Dan scored 39 points and 7 cornholes, averaging 5.6 points per round. At the other end of the boards, Nick scored 51 points and 13 cornholes, averaging 6.4 points per round, while KP scored 50 points and 14 cornholes, averaging 6.3 points per round.

MUSHROOM STAMP MOMENT (“MSM”)

Week 8 featured so many candidates for the Mushroom Stamp Moment, but let’s continue to go rogue this week…normally the winning of the MSM hit a huge shot or round to clinch a game or ignite a game-changing run. This week’s MSM is different – flashback to the Game 6 summary above when the game was on the line, pressure was intense, Pete and Dan both threw a phenomenal round that ended in a 10 – 10. That round from both players earns this week’s MSM.

The honorable mention MSM goes to Bob. In Game 12 Bob hit one of the sickest shots you’ll see, defying physics when his bag rode the left rail (i.e., side of the board) and suddenly shifted hard right around two of Turley’s blockers, finding the bottom of the hole. It was such a hard right turn that Dan and KP looked at each other in amazement, wondering how the bag performed that way. Bob did win that round, 7 – 5, giving his team a 17 – 12 lead. But they went on to lose that game, which is partially why he isn’t rewarded with the MSM.

NEWS AND NOTES

• Nick was off the charts this week, registering a 20.4 KPM with 6.3 points per round, 1.6 cornholes per round and 79% accuracy. Those numbers helped him to a 6 – 2 record, including a comeback. Somehow Nick was #5 in the Power Rankings coming into the week, which I’m pretty sure is the lowest ranking he’s ever had. He jumped to #3 after this week’s performance.
• KP ended the night at 17.8 KPM, averaging 5.6 points per round and 1.34 cornholes per round with 73% accuracy. He ended the night with a 7 – 2 record and remains at #2 in the Power Rankings.
• Turley stays at #6 in the Power Rankings despite a 16.3 KPM. He finished the night with a 5 – 5 record and averaged 5.2 points per round, 1.10 cornholes per round and 75% accuracy.
• JV only played three games before retiring for the night. He finished 1 – 2 with a 13.9 KPM and averaged 4.4 points per round, 0.95 cornholes per round and 63% accuracy.
• Bob dropped from #14 to #16 in the Power Rankings, partially because of Pete’s surge and partially because Bob only produced a 12.1 KPM. His 1 – 7 record was abysmal, but if there is a silver lining in all of this, it’s that he had several opportunities to clinch close games. Despite coming up empty all night, those experiences could pay off in the future. Bob averaged 3.9 points per round, 0.76 cornholes per round and 59% accuracy.

BEVERLY HILLS, MICHIGAN – Mr. Cocksucker, the most decorated champion in LEG history, turned 40 years old this week! When reflecting back, it’s hard to believe we started the LEG shenanigans when he was 33 years old, and we’re still going at it seven seasons later. Happy Birthday, Nicholas!

Part of the group’s birthday gift to Mr. Cocksucker was some new, rookie blood. Whether it’s swooping in sober at 9 pm and dominating when the rest of the group has been drinking for 3+ hours, or “aww shucks’ing” his way to a 21 – 0 win over innocent rookies, Nick basks in the glory of beating up on the less fortunate.

Enter stage right – his latest victims, rookies Dan and Pete. These newbies arrive with less fanfare than the current Rookie of the Year favorite, Brent, but only because they aren’t on the cornhole circuit making names for themselves. Both players have natural skills and love to play the game. LEG is the perfect environment for them to thrive.

Before thriving, they must take their customary lumps. Those lumps included the following:

• Dan and Pete partnering in Game 1 against Galz and KP. They lost the match, 21 – 9, in just six innings and had to deal with KP throwing rounds of 12, 10 and 12 on his way to averaging 8.7 points per round.
• Dan and Pete partnered in Game 6 against JV and Bushie. More to come on that in the Game of the Night.
• Pete losing his head-to-head battle against JV in Game 7, 31 – 25, and almost blowing an 18 – 14 lead to lose the game. JV put a 10-spot on Pete (won the round 10 – 5) to give his team a 19 – 18 lead, but he almost hit a 4-bagger that would’ve won the game. For Pete’s sake (see what I did there?), Bushie bailed him out in the bottom of the inning, recovering to win the game 21 – 19.
• Dan losing his head-to-head match with Nick in Game 15, 31 – 26. Barker was on fire, though, and carried Dan to a 21 – 12 victory.
• Dan and Dibble partnering in Game 16 against Coach Mike and KP. They lost the match, 21 – 3, and Coach outscored Dan head-to-head, 28 – 23.
• Dan and Barker partnering in Game 18 against Dibble and Bushie. They lost the match, 21 – 19, and Dibble outscored Dan head-to-head, 27 – 23. Even worse, Dan and Barker logged a “choke” with this collapse – they were leading the game 19 – 3 before giving up 18 unanswered points to lose the match.

While there were plenty of negative moments, both players also had a lot to be proud of. Pete finished his first night with a 12.6 KPM, averaging 4.1 points per round and 0.71 cornholes per round on 67% shooting. He also had a 2 – 3 record, and flashed potential as arguably the best airmail thrower in the league.

Meanwhile, Dan posted a 14.7 KPM and 4 – 4 record thanks to 4.8 points per round, 0.84 cornholes per round and a blistering 79% accuracy.

GAME OF THE NIGHT

The Game of the Night featured the rookies, Dan and Pete, against JV and Bushie. The rookies did a great job early in the match of keeping things close, until JV hit Pete with an 8 – 2 round to help his team take a commanding 13 – 5 lead. At this point, you’d expect a rookie pairing to collapse under such a large deficit, but they showed resilience when Dan immediately scored five points against Bushie (won the round 6 – 1) to vault his team back into the game – 13 – 10.

JV immediately pushed the score to 16 – 10 with another 8-point round (won the round 8 – 5). But Dan was there to the rescue again, winning the round 8 – 5 against Bushie and cutting the deficit to 16 – 13.

JV and Dan volleyed points back and forth for their respective teams, with JV scoring two more and upping the lead to 18 – 13. Dan immediately responded with three of his own to make it 18 – 16.

Serve was broken in the top of the seventh when Pete finally scored on JV, tallying two points to tie the game at 18 – 18. Dan wanted badly to capitalize on his partner’s big round by closing the game. He almost did, but threw an errant bag off the board and settled for two points, taking their first lead of the entire game, 20 – 18.

Here we go again – a clutch moment near the end of the game and the bags are in JV’s hands. He delivered three times in similar moments just last week. This time was no different, as he gave Pete a lesson in clutch performances. JV won the round 5 – 2, using two blocker bags to prevent Pete from easy hole access and then drilled an airmail to secure the game, 21 – 20.

Welcome to the league, rookies.

MUSHROOM STAMP MOMENT (“MSM”)

Game 2 was a close match the entire game, with Bob and Brent leading the entire time against Bushie and JV. Bob and Brent held a 19 – 17 lead late in the game with the bags in Bob and Bushie’s hands.

Bob had an opportunity to apply tons of pressure on Bushie, but missed his first bag off the side of the board. That was the opening Bushie needed, and he proceeded to drill three consecutive cornholes to take a 9 – 2 lead in the round after three bags. Bob was helpless, his final bag did not matter. Bushie tried to cap a great round with a 4-bagger, but missed long off the back of the board. No matter, his 9 – 2 round gave his team their first lead of the game when it mattered most…to score 21 points and win the game 21 – 19.

Bushie earns this week’s Mushroom Stamp Moment for delivering in a big time moment.

NEWS AND NOTES

• The Birthday Boy had a great night, going 4 – 3 with an 18.4 KPM and averaged 5.8 points per round and 1.35 cornholes per round on 78% shooting. He sank two 10-point rounds and two 4-baggers.
• KP threw a 21.0 KPM thanks to 6.5 points per round, 1.70 cornholes per round and 77% shooting. He added seven 10-point rounds and two 4-baggers. Despite those numbers, he finished with a 2 – 4 record.
• Brent was on fire, throwing a 20.9 KPM, 6.5 points per round, 1.71 cornholes per round, and 76% shooting. Those numbers helped him to a 2 – 1 record this week.
• Barker also played very well, going 4 – 1 with an 18.2 KPM, 5.7 points per round, 1.37 cornholes per round and 74% shooting. He knocked in two 4-baggers, matching his season total entering this week.
• Dibble went 3 – 3 with a 16.3 KPM, 5.2 points per round, 1.18 cornholes per round and 70% accuracy. Not a bad night at all, but he did slip from #2 to #3 in the Power Rankings.
• Bushie had an excellent week with a 7 – 4 record and 14.7 KPM. He was part of the huge comeback win in Game 18, scoring eight of his team’s 18 points during their game-winning streak. He scored 4.7 points per round, 1.0 cornholes per round and 68% shooting.
• Galz fell from #9 to #13 in the Power Rankings because of his 10.7 KPM. He averaged just 3.6 points per round and 0.56 cornholes per round on 61% shooting. A forgettable night for him.
• Coach really struggled, going 1 – 7 with an 11.2. KPM, 3.6 average points per round, 0.67 cornholes per round and 57% shooting.
• JV was less than stellar with an 11.7 KPM, causing him to fall from #7 to #10 in the Power Rankings. He averaged 3.9 points per round and only 0.66 cornholes per round on 64% shooting. He did, however, have some loud moments despite his overall inconsistency.
• Bob went 2 – 2 with a 12.4 KPM, averaging 4.0 points per round, 0.77 cornholes per round and 62% shooting.

CLAWSON, MICHIGAN – For the second consecutive week we’re in birthday celebration mode…this time it’s double the pleasure, double the fun! Unfortunately the Double Mint Twins weren’t making an appearance, so we had to settle for Jack and Erik.

Last week’s celebration of Coach Mike overwhelmed the cornhole effectiveness, with most players throwing poorly. Maybe it was the hardened livers, maybe we were all still drunk and found our groove from seven days ago. No matter the cause, the effect was more entertaining cornhole this week, compared to last.

Normal nights kick-off with a friendly pillow fight, with both sides softly batting each other around until someone concedes the “match”. Not this week. This week’s opener was like the new porn star thoroughbred who couldn’t wait to bust a nut. Bob and JV challenged Paul and Rich, and it got out of hand quickly – Bob and JV jumped out to a 12 – 1 lead thanks to eight points from JV across two innings, and a 10-point round from Bob that contributed an additional four points.

The score through two innings was 12 – 1, which is impressive but also in the choke/comeback territory. SPOILER ALERT!

Somehow after two innings Bob outscored Rich head-to-head, 13 – 10. Well, that didn’t last. Bob’s 10-point second inning slipped through his fingers like sand in an hourglass. He followed that up with rounds of 1, 0, 3 against the most talented player to ever participate in LEG (Rich).

Bob woke the sleeping giant with his 10-point second inning, and was then swallowed by the giant. His team’s 12 – 1 lead quickly evaporated. JV did everything he could to score points against Paul. It didn’t matter. Rich produced scoring round of 7 (8 – 1), 7 (7 – 0), and 6 (9 – 3) to complete the comeback and hand JV and Bob a choke, 21 – 14.

It was a phenomenal comeback by Rich (Paul essentially did nothing, with all due respect). But can I ask a frank question? How the hell does someone throw a 10-point round and follow it up with rounds of 1, 0, and 3? Credit to Rich. He would’ve continued grinding until the “W” was in the left side of his column. Still, one can’t help but wonder about the result of this opener had Bob maintained even a shred of composure.

GAME OF THE NIGHT

Choosing this week’s Game of the Night was incredibly difficult because five of the 15 games played were decided by four points or fewer. Ultimately, the choice was Game 5, which pitted JV and KP against Erik and Rich.

Points were difficult to score early in this game, with Rich and Erik leading 6 – 5 after three innings. In the top of the fourth inning, KP created a little separation by throwing a 4-bagger to win the round 12 – 7 over Rich, giving his team a 10 – 6 lead. JV added another point in the bottom of the fourth inning to make it 11 – 6.

Rich and Erik scraped together three points in the fifth inning, cutting their deficit to 11 – 9, but JV and KP tacked on four more points in the sixth inning thanks to an 8 – 5 round for JV over Erik. The scoreboard was 15 – 9 after sixth innings.

In the top of the seventh inning Rich repaid the 12 – 7 favor to KP, throwing a 4-bagger of his own to rally his team within a point, 15 – 14. Erik hopped on the momentum train and outscored JV 5 – 2 in the bottom of the seventh inning, giving his team a 17 – 15 advantage.

Rich pushed the scoring run to 10 – 0 and upped the lead to 19 – 15 with a 9 – 7 advantage over KP in the top of the eighth.

A 15 – 9 lead for JV and KP was gone in the blink of an eye (1.5 innings), and they no longer had room for error. JV calmed the storm a bit with two points in the bottom of the eighth inning, 19 – 17.

KP delivered two enormous points in the top of the ninth to tie the game, 19 – 19. He won the round 7 – 5, and had an opportunity to win the game by making a cornhole with his final throw. His final bag was on target, but couldn’t push through two of Rich’s blockers to find the hole.

The bags were back in the hands of the league’s best closer, JV. Erik is a strong player, but his history of coming up big in end of game moments is not as decorated as JV’s. Add in the fact that Erik had only outscored JV in two of the eight innings leading up to this moment, what happened next was almost too predictable. JV recorded five points after his first three bags, while Erik missed the board with all three of his throws. The game was over, so JV tried a ridiculous airmail drag on his fourth bag. He missed it, but it didn’t matter because even if Erik went in the hole on his final bag, the round was still 5 – 3 for JV, which was good enough for a 21 – 19 victory. Erik’s final bag stopped short of the hole, giving JV a 5 – 1 final round to win the game.

Erik finished the game with 25 points and two cornholes, averaging just 2.8 points per round, which was significantly below his season average of 4.6 points per round. JV scored 35 points and 6 cornholes while averaging 3.9 points per round. Most importantly to JV, though, was the stat of closing out yet another game. The only stat he truly cares about is winning, and when it’s winning time he rises to the occasion. Unfortunately we don’t track games closed, but I’d be willing to bet a lot of money that JV would sit atop that list if we did track that stat.

The other end of the boards was lights out – KP scored 67 points and 19 cornholes while averaging 7.5 points per round, and Rich scored 73 points and 22 cornholes while averaging 8.1 points per round.

MUSHROOM STAMP MOMENT (“MSM”)

This week’s Mushroom Stamp Moment is a bit unique. Normally we give this award for a specific

moment in a game, but this week’s award goes to someone who had an outstanding overall performance.

This week’s MSM is Rich’s total numbers. He was exceptional, shooting a 25.8 KPM, scoring 7.9 points per round, 2.27 cornholes per round, and 83% accuracy. He threw 12 total 10-point rounds and seven 4-baggers (i.e., 12-point rounds). It’s the most impressive week in the history of LEG, and for that reason deserves the week 6 Mushroom Stamp Moment.

NEWS AND NOTES

• Turley defied logic this week. He posted a 20.6 KPM while scoring 6.4 points per round and 1.56 cornholes per round on 83% shooting. Yet, he didn’t win a single game, going 0 – 3 with a -4.3 scoring differential. How does that happen? At least he can feel good about his performance, which included three 10-point rounds and one 4-bagger.
• Brent also had a great week, going 2 – 1 with a 20.8 KPM and averaged 6.4 points per round and 1.69 cornholes per round on 77% shooting.
• KP went 6 – 3 with a 20.3 KPM, averaging 6.3 points per round and 1.60 cornholes per round on 78% shooting. He finished the night with six 10-point rounds and one 4-bagger.
• JV had another strong week with a 5 – 3 record and 14.9 KPM. He averaged 4.7 points per round and 1.09 cornholes per round on 63% shooting. His most impressive stat was that he closed out three tight games with the winning points, which included the Game of the Night and games 12 and 14.
• Galz began his path to getting back on track this week, shooting a 14.1 KPM and averaging 4.4 points per round and 1.06 cornholes per round on 58% shooting. Galz hit two 4-baggers and another 10-point round tonight, good signs for his recovery. He still finds himself at #9 in the Power Rankings, which is hard to fathom given he’s never finished lower than fourth in the Power Rankings since joining the league in 2018.
• Erik had a less than stellar birthday week, posting just an 11.4 KPM. As outlined in the Game of the Night, Erik struggled. He scored 3.8 points per round and 0.62 cornholes per round on 63% shooting – all well-below his season averages. It should be no surprise he finished the night winless, 0 – 4.
• After a fantastic week 5, Jack dropped from #6 to #14 in the Power Rankings this week because of his 11.9 KPM. He did throw one 10-point round, but was much less consistent this week – scoring 3.9 points per round, 0.74 cornholes per round and 59% accuracy, while posting a 2 – 4 record.
• Paul finds himself at the bottom of the Power Rankings, dropping from #14 to #16 after shooting a 10.7 KPM on 3.4 points per round, 0.71 cornholes per round and just 50% accuracy.
• Bob had flashes of exceptional performance, as outlined earlier in this recap. Unfortunately for Bob, there were more moments of struggle this week, evidenced by his 11.9 KPM, 3.8 points per round, 0.84 cornholes per round and 52% accuracy. He did salvage the night with a 4 – 2 record, but most of that was due to having strong partners, as Bob only won one of his six head-to-head match-ups this week (29 – 28 against Erik in Game 6).

BEVERLY HILLS, MICHIGAN – It’s a celebration, bitches! This week was centered around Coach Mike’s birthday bash – with Coach Mike on the beats and 12 guys in attendance, the party atmosphere was off the charts, and the cornhole performances were largely subpar because of it.

Two individuals who were anything but subpar were the birthday boy and Jack.

Let’s begin with the guest of honor – Coach threw a 13.0 KPM this week, a drastic jump from his 11.8 season average entering the night. He’s unlikely to be a guy who throws a KPM in the high teens due to his style of play – dirty, muck up the board approach so that his opponent has to execute more difficult shots. Because of that, Coach’s cornhole rate is naturally lower than the players who prefer to slide in the hole on a clean board. So, the most effective version of Coach will be on display when his KPM starts to creep into the mid-teens because that means he’s tossing more accurately and with that, littering the board with obstacles for his opponent to navigate.

This week’s version of Coach Mike was damn near perfection, for the style he wants to play. His 13.0 KPM is nice, but it’s about how he posted that number – 73% accuracy, 4.3 points per round and 0.68 cornholes per round. He’s capable of increasing the cornholes per round without sacrificing his style of play, and when he does, Coach becomes a tough player to beat.

Coach earned a 2 – 2 record this week, which included a +3.3 scoring differential across his four games. He got the best of KP head-to-head in Game 5, outscoring him 33 – 26 to help his team to a 21 – 13 victory.

In Game 3, he neutralized Nick in the head-to-head battle as he was narrowly outscored, 32 – 31. Playing Nick to a draw is impressive for anyone, but when Coach Mike pulls that off, it’s almost certainly a recipe for victory – in this game, it was recipe for a 21 – 6 blowout for Coach’s team.

In Game 6, Coach took a bite out of another top five player in the league, this time going head-to-head with Turley and holding his own. Turley barely held a scoring edge in this game, winning it 52 – 47. Coach and Steve-O almost pulled a pretty big upset against Turley and Bob, losing the match 21 – 18. But without Coach holding serve against Turley, this game is a blowout.

If the above synopsis of Coach’s night still doesn’t impress you, then think about this – forget the fact that he handcuffed three of the top five players in the league from a head-to-head standpoint; he also held them below their season average in points per round.

• Game 3 against Nick – coming into this week Nick averaged 5.7 points per round, and was held to 5.3 points per round in this game. In Nick’s final round of the game, he threw a 10-point round (Coach threw an 8). Nick had averaged just 4.4 points per round prior to that 10-point outburst.
• Game 5 against KP – coming into this week KP averaged 5.9 points per round, and Coach locked him up, allowing him to score a meager 3.25 point per round in this game.
• Game 6 against Turley – coming into this week Turley averaged 5.2 points per round, and thanks to Coach’s stingy defense, was held to 4.7 points per round in this game.

This is filthy Coach Mike, a tough SOB on the boards. The key is for him to bring this level every week, and especially in tournaments.

Let’s flip the script to Jack, who had arguably the best night of his career with a 15.1 KPM. He appears in the Power Rankings for the first time this season (this was the first week he played), and enters with a loud bang at #6. He averaged 4.8 points per round due to 65% shooting and 1.08 cornholes per round. His +8.5 point differential on the night was absurd, and easily the highest of any player this week.

Jack capped his night with a masterpiece, almost doubling Bushie in their head-to-head match-up, 32 – 17 and averaged 5.3 points per round while leading Steve-O to a 21 – 7 cakewalk over Bushie and JV.

Far too often the focus and talking points are centered around the higher ranked players in the league. However, when players like Coach and Jack up their level of play, the entire league becomes stronger and game results become even more unpredictable. Seeing these guys grow is part of what makes this league so much fun, and it makes us all better players.

GAME OF THE NIGHT

This week’s Game of the Night featured Steve-O and Bushie against Bob and Paul. Bushie began the game scorching hot with rounds of 7, 6, 7, helping his team to an early 10 – 5 lead. Paul, to his credit, withstood Bushie’s flurry, not flinching when the early haymakers were coming at him hard and heavy.

In the fourth inning, Paul got the best of Bushie, 8 – 5, to cut his team’s deficit to 10 – 8. Bob added three more points in the sixth inning, with Paul chipping in another and suddenly the game was tied, 12 – 12.

Bushie found his zone again in the sixth inning, draining two cornholes and piling two more bags near the hole to win the round 8 – 4, increasing his team’s lead to 16 – 12. But in the seventh inning Bob and Paul manufactured a quick 6-point burst to take an 18 – 16 lead, powered by four points from Bob after he hit a ridiculous airmail drag for six points (he won the round 6 – 2), and Paul scratching out two points in a rare low-scoring inning (3 – 1 in favor of Paul over Bushie).

In the strangest rollercoaster you’ll see, Bushie recovered from his 1-point round in the seventh inning with an 8-point round in the eighth inning. If you’re counting at home, that’s an 8, 1, 8 stretch from the sixth through eighth inning for Bushie, causing the game to seesaw from 12 – 12 to 16 – 12, then 16 – 12 to 16 – 18, and finally from 16 – 18 to 19 – 18. Meanwhile, Steve-O was washing rounds at the other end with Bob, including the bottom half of the eighth inning, leaving the score at 19 – 18.

With the majority of the game’s scoring dependent upon Bushie’s ups and downs, the top of the ninth inning was primed to be the deciding moment of the game. Bushie started the round with a cornhole, followed by an errant bag by Paul. Bushie’s second bag landed on the board, followed by another errant bag by Paul.

With the score 4 – 0 after two bags, Paul was in a serious hole with the game on the line. Bushie let him off the hook by missing his third bag, unfortunately Paul’s third bag was out of play on the board. Bushie’s fourth bag also missed the board, requiring Paul to make a cornhole to tie the round and extend the game. His final toss rolled up the middle of the board and stopped just shy of the hole – 4 – 2, Bushie wins the round and clinches the game, 21 – 18. It was a rather anticlimactic finish to an otherwise thrilling game, but a win is a win!

Bushie finished the game with 50 points and 12 cornholes, averaging 5.6 points per round. Without his stinker rounds of one point and four points, Bushie averaged 6.8 points per round!

Paul tried to hang with Bushie, scoring 42 points and 7 cornholes, averaging 4.7 points per round, but didn’t have enough firepower in the end.

At the other end of the boards, Bob scored 33 points and 7 cornholes, averaging 4.1 points per round, while Steve-O scored 28 points and 4 cornholes, averaging 3.5 points per round.

MUSHROOM STAMP MOMENT (“MSM”)

Game 8 incorporated four of the top five players in the league with Nick and KP partnering to battle Brent and Turley. This game started as a knife fight, with points hard to come by. But Nick blew the game open with back-to-back 10-point rounds in the third and fourth innings, netting him 10 total points and driving his team’s lead from 7 – 4 to 19 – 4. Nick and KP closed the game shortly thereafter, coasting to a 21 – 11 victory.

Nick’s back-to-back 10-point rounds were the turning point in this match, and are enough to earn this week’s mushroom stamp moment.

NEWS AND NOTES

Given the large group, the “News and Notes” section will be rapid fire and recap this week’s statistics for each player.

• Dibble limped to a 14.3 KPM, but the sample size was small enough (two games) that it didn’t cause him to lose his grip on the #1 spot in the Power Rankings. He averaged 4.5 points per round and 1.0 cornholes per round on 63% shooting.
• KP posted a 17.0 KPM and 4 – 2 record while averaging 5.4 points per round, 1.26 cornholes per round and 71% accuracy. He remains #2 in the Power Rankings.
• Nick recorded a 17.1 KPM and 1 – 3 record while averaging 5.4 points per round, 1.21 cornholes per round and 75% accuracy. He holds steady at #3 in the Power Rankings.
• Brent was the leader in the clubhouse with an 18.8 KPM and 1 – 1 record while averaging 5.8 points per round, 1.50 cornholes per round and 71% accuracy. He also holds his spot in the Power Rankings at #4.
• Turley posted a 14.8 KPM and 3 – 2 record while averaging 4.8 points per round, 0.94 cornholes per round and 72% accuracy. He came into the week at #5 in the Power Rankings and remains there after this week.
• JV had a pretty good week with a 14.9 KPM, despite an 0 – 2 record. He averaged 4.8 points per round and 1.0 cornholes per round on 69% shooting. He dropped from #6 to #7 in the Power Rankings thanks to Jack’s emergence in the Power Rankings.
• Bob also made his first appearance of the season, posting a 14.3 KPM which was good enough to secure the #10 spot in the Power Rankings. He averaged 4.6 points per round, 0.97 cornholes per round and 66% accuracy while going 1 – 4 on the evening.
• Steve-O just wins games, baby! He went 3 – 1 with a 13.3 KPM, earning him the #12 spot in the Power Rankings. He averaged 4.4 points per round and 0.77 cornholes per round on 70% shooting.
• Bushie went 1 – 2 with a 13.2 KPM, good enough to lockdown the #13 spot in the Power Rankings. He averaged 4.3 points per round and 0.76 cornholes per round on 70% shooting.
• Finally, Paul posted a 14.3 KPM and 1 – 2 record while averaging 4.7 points per round, 0.76 cornholes per round and 80% shooting. Overall, a great statistical night for Paul. Unfortunately for him, he dropped from #10 to #14 in the Power Rankings thanks to the newcomers making their first appearance in the Power Rankings this season (Jack, Bob, Steve-O and Bushie).

SOUTHFIELD, MICHIGAN – Dibble had himself a night this week, scoring 6.4 points per round and 1.74 cornholes per round while shooting 74%. He scored three 12-point rounds and three 10-point rounds this week. Add it all up and it yielded a 20.9 KPM, jumping him from #3 to #1 in the young season Power Rankings.

And boy did the rest of the league hear about it. Shortly after the updated Power Rankings and statistics were posted to the league website, Dibble sent a screen shot, taunting the group with his name atop the rankings.

Give credit where it’s due, his 20.9 KPM this week and 19.8 KPM overall are undoubtedly impressive. But it’s a long season, and boasting about being #1 in the Power Rankings when there are four months remaining in the season is akin to celebrating on the sidelines when there’s 10 seconds left in the football game and your team still has to execute a punt…

God help us if Dibble ever wins a tournament because we’ll never hear the end of it.

GAME OF THE NIGHT

Speaking of never hearing the end of it, the bromance continued this week with Dibble and Brent slurping each other up all night. Dibble and Brent have each played 13 and 14 total games this season, respectively, and eight of their games have been as partners.

Encouraging them to “get a room” would be an understatement – the group was fearful we’d have to take cover while these two recreated the lift scene from Dirty Dancing in Brent’s pool.

“Heeeeeeeey, hey baby! I wanna know, if you’ll be my girl.”

Dibble, without hesitation, “Yes!”

Game 3 featured The Ambiguously Gay Duo against Galz and KP. In what appears to be their new pre-game ritual, Ace and Gary…errr…Dibble and Brent gathered at midcourt and summoned powerful cornhole skills from their “lightsaber,” which I’m still convinced is a double-dong dildo.

Early on, the double-dong prayers didn’t appear to help as both players were shooting blanks. They quickly found themselves down 13 – 4 after two innings.

But then Dibble exploded with a 6 – 0 advantage in the top of the third inning, bringing his team within four points, 14 – 10.  After exchanging a few points in the fourth inning, it was 16 – 11 in favor of KP and Galz.

Cue some Dibble heroics – he sank three cornholes in the fifth inning, securing a 9 – 3 advantage and propelling his team to a 17 – 16 lead. KP tied it at 17 – 17, but missed a push shot that could have won the game had he hit it.

In the top of the sixth, Dibble delivered the money shot. He drained three cornholes and added another bag on the board for 10 points, overwhelming Galz 10 – 4 to win the match 21 – 17. Dibble was visibly excited, quickly slapping hands with his opponent before embracing his partner with celebration.

As he squeezed Brent, the group overhead Dibble’s failed whispers of sweet nothings – “I don’t wanna spit, I wanna gulp. I wanna gag, I wanna choke. I want you to touch that lil’ dangly thing that swings in the back of my throat.”

Okay, those are actually Cardi B lyrics, but you can imagine what it’d be like if Dibble really said that. Right?

Really, though, the two hopped in their cock car and threw themselves a celebratory parade.

MUSHROOM STAMP MOMENT

We might as well stay on theme, this week’s Mushroom Stamp Moment (“MSM”) also involves Dibble and Brent. This time, they were head-to-head…no, they weren’t “docking”! Pull your head out of the gutter!

In Game 9, Dibble and Erik had Brent and JV on the ropes with a 17 – 8 lead. Dibble, trying his best to impress his butt-buddy, hit three cornholes in the fifth inning and Brent couldn’t handle this stud (don’t worry, he tried again later in the evening), only scoring one point. The 9 – 1 round clinched a 21 – 8 victory for Dibble and Erik, and gives Dibble this week’s MSM!

NEWS AND NOTES

• Turley had a nice week, scoring four 10-point rounds on his way to a 16.5 KPM, 5.3 points per round, 1.13 cornholes per round and 75% shooting. Excellent numbers for him, which unfortunately did not produce victories – he finished with a 2 – 6 record. Nonetheless, he appears in the Power Rankings for the first time this season, entering at #4
• Brent was leap-frogged by his boyfriend in the Power Rankings, falling from #1 to #3. His individual metrics fell short of his high ceiling (15.2 KPM, 4.9 points per round, 1.02 cornholes per round, and 71% accuracy), yet he still won games, evidenced by his 5 – 2 record. He can thank Dibble for that
• JV had a steady night, shooting 71% and scoring 4.9 points per round…much better than last week’s 49% and 4.3 points per round. His 15.5 week 2 KPM helped him jump from #7 to #5 in the Power Rankings
• Erik fell from #4 to #7 in the Power Rankings, despite playing pretty well! He had a 4 – 3 record while producing a 14.1 KPM thanks to 67% shooting, 0.92 cornholes per round and 4.5 points per round
• Galz had arguably his roughest week ever – 13.9 KPM, 4.4 points per round and 0.89 cornholes per round on 64% shooting. Maybe it’s because his pink eye settled down, or maybe he was overwhelmed by the male erotica. I don’t expect him to stay down for long
• KP logged a 20.1 KPM, 6.3 points per round and 1.52 cornholes per round on 82% shooting, all of which contributed to a 6 – 2 record

CLAWSON, MICHIGAN – The week following a tournament typically feels like a hangover. The players are moving slow, the energy is low, and the environment is just a little sleepy.

Week 1 wasn’t much different, with player after player filing up the driveway, as if they were doing the “walk of shame”…until Dibble showed up. The guy was bouncing off the walls, “I missed you guys! I missed this!”

And then when Brent arrived and Dibble realized there was a new addition to the league, which means an opportunity for a new best friend, he was like a rescue dog vying for attention from a prospective family – tail wagging, jumping up and down, “Pick me! Pick me!”

His injection of energy was just what the doctor ordered.

GAME OF THE NIGHT

Dibble brought that energy to the Game of the Night, where he partnered with his new best friend, Brent. Really, they are best friends. Of the 12 games in week 1, Dibble latched on to Brent in four of those games (insert laughing emoji).

Their Game 6 opponents were Galz and KP, who took an early 7 – 0 lead after the top of the first inning. The besties shook off their opponent’s quick start and put together their own 19 – 1 run, giving them a 19 – 8 lead. During that stretch, Dibble score nine points against Galz, while Brent posted 10 points against KP, powered by a 10 – 5 advantage in the top of the sixth inning.

KP encouraged Galz, reminding his partner that the game doesn’t start until a “choke” is in play (i.e., one team holds a 10+ point advantage and must close the game). Galz savors opportunities like this, and promptly responded with two points to close the deficit to 19 – 10.

It was KP’s turn to put up or shut up. He delivered a four-bagger, while Brent managed just three points. A 12 – 3 win in the top of the seventh inning knotted the game at 19 – 19 **AND** positioned Galz to clinch the match by completing the “comeback” (and securing a “choke” for Dibble and Brent).

Galz and Dibble both threw cornholes with their first two bags. Clutch performances in a tense moment. Galz’s third bag missed long and right, but stayed on the board for a 7 – 6 advantage. Dibble applied pressure with a third straight cornhole, requiring Galz to score on his final bag to keep the game alive. Galz always goes down swinging, and played for the cornhole. His bag was a little too firm and skipped over the hole, falling off the back of the board.

The game was over, and Dibble missed an irrelevant airmail attempt. His 9 – 7 advantage was enough to win, 21 – 19, and the friendship strengthened.

MUSHROOM STAMP MOMENT (“MSM”)

The first MSM of the 2022 season belongs to JV. In Game 10, JV threw a perfect block with his first bag of the round. Barker navigated it perfectly, slipping his bag around the block and into the hole. Without hesitation, JV threw an airmail and hit it!

Barker missed long off the back with his second bag.

JV immediately hit another airmail, leaving his blocker in place.

Barker again missed off the back.

JV went up again, draining a third consecutive airmail, leaving his blocker for Barker to contemplate.

Barker’s last bag was off the back again, unable to navigate the laundry on the board.

JV won the round 10 – 3, which gave his team a 12 – 4 lead and broke the game open. He and Erik finished the job, winning easily, 21 – 7. He played the round perfectly with a block, airmail, airmail, airmail. That’s professional-level cornhole, which is why he earns this week’s mushroom stamp moment.

NEWS AND NOTES

• Brent reinforced his championship performance by earning the top spot in the Power Rankings this week and had a +12.1 point differential for the night (i.e., averaged wins of 21 – 9). His 19.7 KPM, 6.1 points per round, 71% accuracy, 1.62 cornholes per round, and 7 – 0 record were dominant. He added five 10-point rounds and two 12-point rounds to his week 1 resume
• Dibble avoided having Brent FOMO and kept pace with an 18.3 KPM, 5.7 points per round, 71% accuracy, 1.43 cornholes per round, and 4 – 2 record (all four wins were as Brent’s partner). Impressive numbers under any circumstance, but especially so considering the long layoff he’s had
• JV was great in earning the MSM, but his numbers are head-scratching – his 14.1 KPM is good. But he pulled that off on just 49% accuracy, which is sub-par. JV was basically boom (cornhole) or bust (errant shot) all night, but his “booms” sure were amazing
• Barker somehow went 0 – 5 despite putting up good numbers – 14.5 KPM, 73% KPM, 4.7 points per round, and a 12-point round. His biggest downfall was “only” hitting 0.88 cornholes per game. Nonetheless, the donut in win column was shocking and unusual. Don’t get used to that
• Erik dropped a 12-point round, which helped him to a 14.7 KPM (#4 in the Power Rankings), 4.7 points per round, 65% accuracy, 1.03 cornholes per round, and 2 – 3 record. This is a great start to the 2022 campaign, showing Erik continues to build on the growth he’s demonstrated the last few seasons
• Galz went 2 – 5 overall with a 14.2 KPM, 64% accuracy and 4.5 points per round. His 0.98 cornholes per round was un-Galz-like, but expect that number to rise as the season progresses
• Paul was last in this week’s Power Rankings at #8, but his numbers were good! He continues to increase his accuracy, shooting 63% this week. He also hit 0.88 cornholes per round and 4.3 points per round, earning a 13.3 KPM and 3 – 3 record. Paul also outscored his opponent head-to-head in four of his six matches
• KP finished second in the Power Rankings this week with an 18.4 KPM. He also averaged 5.8 points per round, 76% accuracy, 1.38 cornholes per round and produced a 4 – 3 record. He also recorded two 10-point rounds and two 12-point rounds