BEVERLY HILLS, MICHIGAN – Just when you think you know everything about Coach Mike, he surprises you again. Last year he demonstrated his versatility when he informed the group of Usher’s herpes. This week, we finally discovered what Coach hides in the YETI he’s drinking every time he arrives to cornhole. Most assumed it might be a Bud Light Lime roadie to get him mentally prepared for the night, or the remains of his morning coffee, providing that jolt of energy we all expect from him.

The truth? It’s Kool-Aid. That’s right, this grown ass man drinks Tropical Punch Kool-Aid…every…single…day.

In case there was ever any doubt, it’s settled now. Coach Mike is the man.

Week 3 was an interesting week, with five of the 11 games decided by by double-digits and no game was closer than 21-14. This week was also a continuation of the sensitive foot snag topic, which was ignited when Erik attempted to foot snag Bushie, his partner, in game 1. Bushie, still fuming from foot snag controversy in week 2, threatened to kick Erik’s ass if he ever tries to foot snag him again. What is it with Erik wanting to foot snag his partners? Also, if there is one person NOT to foot snag, it’s Bushie. The guy already drinks Coors Lights faster than any human can chug water, so there is no beer chugging incentive with snagging Bushie. Erik claims he’ll foot snag any player, partner or not, in order to pad his stats. He’s chasing the 2018 foot snag crown, and doesn’t care about pissing anyone off along the way. Atta boy, Erik.

In game 4, Erik was partners with Paul and once again showed no mercy when he foot snagged Paul. Bushie and Coach Mike looked on in disgust, while Paul bitched about having to chug the rest of his beer. “I’m drinking an Oberon!” he cried. Sorry Paul, rules are rules. Erik made Paul abide by the rules, having to finish the chug before the game continued. Funny, because one week earlier Erik didn’t follow league rules when he was bun run 21-0 by Coach Mike and Marco…

In game 5, we had partner-on-partner crime again when Paul and Adam paired up to face Bushie and Coach Mike. Bushie and Coach Mike cruised to a 21-10 victory, but in the third frame Paul foot snagged an errant toss from Adam. Frustrated by his partner foot snagging him and a 10-3 deficit, Adam foot snagged Paul in the bottom half of the third frame to get revenge, and Paul again cried because he had an Oberon in his hands. Two throws later, Paul missed the board long and Adam was there to clean up the mess with his foot. Adam was cold-blooded, snagging his partner twice in one round and Paul drank every last drop of Oberon to pay his debts.

Not surprising, in the fourth round Paul sent a bag toward the board and it came up three feet short. “That was TERRIBLE!” KP exclaimed, as he kept score. Adam must have felt guilty for contributing to his partner’s horrendous throw because he advised Paul to build his arm strength by having more jerk sessions instead of always having girls do it for him. Little does Adam know, Paul has no girls helping him.

The Game of the Night might not look impressive on the scoreboard, but the drama involved was incredible. Coach Mike and Adam knocked off Galz and Paul 21-12. However, Paul and Galz jumped on their opponent quickly, creating a 12-0 advantage after just three rounds. Paul dominated Adam during the early going, outscoring him 12-3 (gross points), chipping in 9 of his team’s 12 early points. Galz struggled, but still outscored Coach Mike 4-1 (gross points).

More than halfway to a bun run, Paul and Galz were feeling confident and began focusing on shutting out their opponent. But in the top of the fourth frame, Adam started ballin’. He outscored Paul 7-1 to shrink the deficit to 12-6 and eliminate any bun run possibility. Coach rode the back-handed taint tickler to a 4-0 advantage in the bottom of the fourth frame, and in the blink of an eye we had a 12-10 game.

In the fifth and sixth frames Adam bested Paul 10-3 and Coach topped Galz 7-0, including a 4-0 final round to clinch the game. To summarize, Paul and Galz raced to a 12-0 lead after the first three rounds, but Adam and Coach responded with a 21-0 run in the final three frames to win the game 21-12. Galz unexpectedly scored only four gross points in the game, and recorded donuts in the final four frames of the game.

Normally, the Mushroom Stamp Moment of the week is awarded to an individual player who has the greatest moment of dominance during the night. However, this week marks the first time in history the MSM goes to a team. But it couldn’t be more appropriate to award Adam and Coach the MSM for overcoming a 12-0 deficit with a 21-0 run.

Congratulations to Adam and Coach for the week 3 MSM.

News and Notes:

• This week was strange in many ways, as outlined above. But also interesting was the low accuracy rates. Only one player was greater than 50% accurate (KP), while all other players ranged from 35% – 49%. Bushie’s house usually yields higher accuracy, but tonight that was not the case.
• KP was the star of the night, going 5-0 and recording the highest KPM of the evening (12.6). He averaged 0.62 cornholes per round, 4.2 gross points per round and registered an impressive 74% accuracy for the night.
• Galz continued to play well, other than the stinker he had in the Game of the Night where he only had 4 gross points. Despite the one bad game, Galz still had a 10.5 KPM, averaged 3.4 gross points per round and knocked in 0.71 cornholes per round (best of the night) while hitting on 49% of his throws. Galz also continued his run of 10-point rounds, recording two more this week. His first 10-point round was in game 1, where he nailed cornholes on his first three throws and had an opportunity for a 12-point round. His final bag landed on the board and he settled for a 10-point round instead, and that also clinched the win for his team.
• Adam had the third highest KPM of the night at 8.7, driven mostly by his 0.57 cornholes per round. Adam was only 2-5 overall for the night, but played better than his record showed. He also recorded a 10-point round in game 2, a 21-14 loss. He also had 5 foot snags on the night, taking his season total to 10, which is good for the league lead (Erik is second with 9).
• Coach Mike got back on track after a few weeks hovering around .500. He went 5-2 and had a solid 8.5 KPM. Coach was reasonably accurate, making 47% of his throws, but his cornhole rate was down compared to normal (only 0.46 cornholes per round).

 

BEVERLY HILLS, MICHIGAN – The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen almost collapsed this week. We had plenty of fireworks, but most of them were related to fighting among league members.

The testiness started right away in Game 1, where Erik and Coach squared off against Galz and KP. In the first frame KP drained a cornhole and added another bag on the board to take a 4-0 lead against Coach Mike, which put Coach on edge. Then in the second frame, Coach managed only 1 of 4 bags on the board and Erik, his TEAMMATE, foot snagged him. Guys, I cannot describe Coach’s fury in my own words. He MF’ed Erik for several minutes, yelled, complained, pleaded to KP about how bad of a move it is to foot snag a teammate. He even threatened to call Erik “Sam” until he earned his real name back with better behavior.

The atmosphere was tense, and that’s when Galz saw an opportunity to make it even worse. He and KP built a 9-0 lead while their opponents fought each other. On the ropes, Erik decided to finally break the scoring drought and seemingly broke some of the tension with his partner. Coach was happy to be off bun run status and vowed that the first point would not be the team’s last.

Insert Galz…attempting to break Coach’s mental game, he taunted him with an offer to bet Coach that they will not score again. A fuming Coach barks that he’ll bet 400 bucks they score again, and Galz propositions his checkbook, suggesting it has unlimited funds.

I’ve never seen Coach so rattled. “Sam” and Coach never scored again, losing 21-1. Coach reneged on Galz’s proposition, claiming a formal bet didn’t exist because hands were not shaken. Galz still got what he wanted, a win and a frustrated Coach.

Sadly, the foot snag topic was just gaining momentum. Bushie watched as all of this unfolded and after the game used the opportunity to make his monthly soap box moment about the bullshit that is a foot snag. He complained about how disruptive the foot snag is to his throwing accuracy (even though the foot snag doesn’t happen until the bag has already caromed off the board) and said the foot snag is banned from the league. KP reminded him that there is only one commissioner and he does not have the power to rescind the foot snag rules. With things on the verge of falling apart, Bushie threatened to quit the league and never host again if the foot snag rule continued. KP called his bluff, saying he can quit over something as stupid as a foot snag, if he chooses.

The entire group was so tense that a bun run happened and wasn’t even communicated to the entire group (we had two boards going, so not everyone saw the shutout). Joe and Erik lost to Coach and Marco, 21-0, and nobody knew about it besides those 4 guys until Friday morning when KP was reviewing the scores for this recap. I assume it was a combination of shame and fear for what Coach and Bushie might do to two nekked men frolicking through the backyard.

Joe and Erik – you will not avoid the consequences of the bun run, so expect to pay the piper in the coming weeks.

Galz made his regular season debut by dropping hammers throughout the night. He averaged a ridiculous 6.4 cornholes per game (best of the night) and 0.72 cornholes per round on the way to an 11.9 KPM (second best of the night).

Galz flexed his muscle in Game 6 when he partnered with Coach Mike to battle Joe and KP. The entire match was a street fight, with Galz and Coach racing out to a 9-4 lead before KP posted a 7-0 advantage over Coach in the fourth frame to give his squad an 11-9 lead. Galz and Coach responded with a run of their own to earn a 14-11 advantage and that’s when Galz took over.

He outscored Joe 7-1, taking a 20-11 lead and putting his foot on Joe and KP’s neck. KP felt momentum punch him in the face, and did his best to keep the team in it. Down 20-11, KP’s first two tosses were cornholes and his third found the board. Meanwhile, Coach had only found the board with one of his bags and KP needed a cornhole to tie the game at 20. On his last toss, KP landed on the board, closing the deficit to 20-18 and needed Joe to somehow silence Galz. But, that didn’t happen…not even close.

Galz put the proverbial teabag right in Joe and KP’s faces by dunking his first two throws while Joe missed his. But Galz wasn’t done. He hit cornhole with his third shot to clinch the match, but now he was chasing rare air…a 12-point round. On his fourth and final toss, Galz found the center of the hole for another cornhole, giving him the first 12 point round of the season and only the fifth in league history. That earned Galz his first Mushroom Stamp Moment of his career.

Galz also had a 10 point round in Game 7 against Erik. Although Erik weathered the storm with a 7 of his own in that round, Galz still led his team to a 21-17 victory.

The Game of the Night was a showdown in game 3 between Galz and Marco vs. Coach and Bushie. This was an intense game of runs, and just when it seemed one team had the advantage, the other team stormed back.

Galz and Marco used a 5 point advantage in the second frame to propel them to an early 7-2 lead, but then Bushie and Coach went on a 13-3 streak of their own to gain a 15-10 lead. Bushie was unstoppable during the run, outscoring Galz by 10 net points (16-6 gross point advantage) and Coach Mike drew even with Marco during the run (16-16 gross points). Marco snagged one point to close the gap to 15-11, but Coach Mike used the back-handed taint tickler to drain a cornhole and another bag on the board, upping the lead to 18-11.

Needing a run in the worst way, Galz started the 10^th frame with two cornholes on his way to outscoring Bushie 6-1, and Marco kept the momentum going in the bottom of the 10^th with two more cornholes as part of a 7-4 advantage over Coach Mike. In the blink of an eye Galz and Marco used an 8 point frame to take a 19-18 lead. In the top of the 11^th frame Galz closed it out against Bushie with a cornhole and two bags on the board, outscoring Bushie 5-3 to win the game 21-18.

Bushie and Coach Mike were extremely accurate and impressively hung in the game despite registering only 8 total cornholes (Bushie with 6, Coach with 2) compared to 18 total cornholes from Galz and Marco (9 for each guy). But Galz and Marco were too much to handle in the end.

Did you notice a theme? Again, it’s all about Galz. He was a bad, bad man this week, earning the MSM, posting a 12-point round, posting a 10-point round and closing out the Game of the Week.

News and Notes:

• Marco deserves some love for his performance this week. He didn’t have as many loud moments as Galz, but he was a stud. He recorded the highest KPM, a ridiculous 12.5, while also earning the highest cornholes per round (0.75), gross points per round (4.0) and second highest accuracy (64%). He also dominated the win-loss column, going 7-3 for the night.
• JV also had a very good night, going 7-3 overall and recorded a 9.7 KPM. He crushed Joe’s spirits in game 11 with a 10-point round, and repeated the 10-point round in game 13 against Bushie to close out the game. It was arguably a Mushroom Stamp Moment of the night, but not quite enough to top Galz’s 12-point round. JV had is most accurate night of his career at 64%, but struggled with cornholes per round (by his standards) with only 0.37. JV is a perfect example of where the new advanced metrics are interesting to analyze – he was great from the right side of the board where his KPM was 10.0; while on the left side he struggled with only a 5.8 KPM.
• KP had another steady night, going 8-4 overall with a KPM of 11.5 (third best of the night). His accuracy continues to be stellar this year; he was 74% for the night and impressively threw 28 straight scoring bags during game 15. In total, he was 31 out of 32 (97% accuracy) for game 15.

New Advanced Metrics:

We are introducing even more advanced metrics, with the ability to now track gross points scored head-to-head (both weekly and cumulative) as well as tracking all our or normal statistics based on a player’s performance on the right and left side of the board.

These advanced metrics will help analyze player tendencies, weaknesses and how they perform head-to-head against other players in the league. Below is a summary of how to navigate the new metrics.

Head-to-Head Metrics

• Cumulative Head-to-Head
  • Columns AM through AP of the Excel file statistics
  • Cell AM3 select the dropdown for the player you want
    • Column AN then auto-populates that players cumulative gross points scored against every player he’s played, while columns AO and AP show the cumulative gross points scored by all the other players when matching up head to head against the player selected in column AN.

For example, if I select Marco in cell AM3, the results I get show his gross points scored compared to each of his opponent’s gross points scored against Marco. He scored 104 gross points in head to head matchups against Galz, while Galz only registered 89 points against Marco.

• Weekly Head-to-Head
  • Columns AQ through AS
  • Cell AQ4 enter the week you would like to analyze
  • Cells AR4 and AS4 select the players you want to compare
    • Cells AR5 and AS5 then auto-populate the head to head results of the players you are analyzing for the week selected.

For example, if you select “2” (for week 2) in cell AQ4, “Marco” in cell AR4 and “Galz” in cell AS4, you will see cell AR5 reveals 104 gross points for Marco and cell AS5 reveals 89 gross points for Galz…the same as you see in the cumulative head to head example above because so far both of those players have only played in week 2.

• Side of Board Performance Metrics
  • Cells B32 and B33
  • Cell B32 select the week you want to analyze and cell B33 the side of the board you want to analyze (right, left or total).
    • The standings and statistics table auto-populates above based on your selections. We began this in week 2, so in future weeks you will also see the cumulative results based on side of the board.

NOVI, MICHIGAN – Only five days after the 2018 Preseason Kick-Off Tournament, a few weekly warriors were chomping at the bit to get back on the court and play. To nobody’s surprise, Barker and JV sat out week 1 as they were still basking in championship glory.

Paul and KP, respectively, were hungry to redeem themselves after deep runs in the Preseason Kick-Off, only to come up short to Everybody Poops. Coach Mike and Erik were both bounced from the Preseason Kick-Off much earlier than anticipated, while Adam had to leave the tournament early because of poor planning with his wife.

All five guys battled extremely windy conditions during the opening regular season week. Despite the difficult conditions, the level of play from all five guys was incredibly impressive. Everyone had a KPM above 8, which is an indicator of an average night, but four of the five guys were above 9.5 on the KPM, which put them on the fringe of a great night.

The Game of the Night featured Erik and Coach Mike vs. Paul and KP in game 3. The game was a dogfight through the first three rounds until KP blew things open in the fourth round with a 6-1 advantage over Erik, helping his team take a 13-7 lead. Paul and KP stayed hot over the next few rounds and built the lead to 19-8. Coach Mike outscored Paul 4-0 in the eighth round, but KP registered a 2-1 advantage over Erik in the same frame to push the lead to 20-12. Paul and KP were on the verge of a big win, but in the ninth round Erik and Coach Mike showed how clutch they are by combining to outscore their opponents by 5 points (Erik crushed KP 7-3, while Coach got the best of Paul 3-2) to pull within 20-17. In the 10th round Coach Mike got the back-handed taint tickler right where Paul didn’t want it, besting him 5-1 to cap a fantastic comeback victory, 21-20.

Erik led the way with 7 total cornholes in the game, and also added 2 foot snags, while Coach Mike also knocked in 6 cornholes during the match.

The first Mushroom Stamp Moment (“MSM”) of the 2018 season goes to Erik, which also happens to be his first MSM of his career. In game 1 Erik dropped a 10 point round in Paul’s face to propel Erik and KP to a 15-11 advantage in the match. Paul had been talking shit all game, trying to get in Erik’s head, and he responded with force. Paul and Adam ultimately rallied to win the game 21-16, so Paul got the last laugh. However, Erik’s 10 point round was the most impressive moment of the night.

Congrats on your popping MSM cherry, Erik!

News and Notes:

• KP started the night losing his first two games, but rallied with four straight wins to close the evening at 4-2. He also posted the highest KPM of the night at 11.9, driven by what might be the highest accuracy week in league history at 73%. His accuracy was aided significantly by hitting 14 straight tosses at one point…pretty impressive numbers considering the wind was a major factor for all players on this night.
• Erik not only earned the MSM, but he also registered a 9.9 KPM, which was second-highest on the night. Keep in mind, a KPM of 10 means you’re having a great night, and Erik certainly did. As mentioned, Erik knocked in a 10 point round, but he also had two additional 9 point rounds, each of which he slammed cornholes on his first three tosses and had two chances to record a 12 point round, but caved to the pressure. Erik had the most total cornholes on the night (32) as well as the highest cornholes per round (0.59) and hit 44% of his tosses, which was very solid in the strong winds. He finished with a 3-4 record, but his individual play took a huge leap forward this week. He also showed off his versatility with 4 foot snags.
• Coach Mike finished the evening with a 3-3 record, and an impressive 9.7 KPM. Coach was very accurate, at 49%, and continued his high cornhole rate at 0.51 cornholes per round. Maybe the most impressive thing about Coach’s night is that he finally recorded the first foot snag of his career! We didn’t have a “CoachFeed” session this week, where Coach share’s the latest in celebrity gossip and pop culture, but he did bust out his dance moves all night, which was worth the price of admission.
• Adam also had an excellent night, finishing with a 9.5 KPM and a 4-2 overall record. He also picked up where he left off in 2017 with his foot snag game by gathering 5 snags. He’s the early favorite for the 2018 foot snag championship, which we know he desperately wants after falling just 1 snag short of the 2017 title to JV. Adam might have been the most accurate he’s ever been, going 46% on the night. Normally Adam’s night would be one of the top two mentions in News and Notes, but everyone had great nights, which makes it seem like Adam is a bit overshadowed. Don’t be fooled though…Adam was ballin’ in the Preseason Kick-Off before he had to leave, and he was playing extremely well in week 1. Adam looks primed for a big jump in the 2018 season.
• Paul’s overall record was only 2-5, but he actually played well, recording an 8.2 KPM, hitting 43% of his tosses and finishing with more total cornholes than KP (23 vs. 21, respectively). Also, Paul’s crushing loss in the Game of the Night flipped a 3-4 record to 2-5. Again, everyone played very well in week 1 and Paul was one of them.

 

BEVERLY HILLS, MICHIGAN – Great anticipation built as the 2018 Preseason Kick-Off Tournament approached, with a record number of players participating (19). The first May weekend brought us sunshine, warm temperatures, Cinco de Mayo and The Kentucky Derby…all the perfect ingredients for a drunken debacle.

The draft format was based on silent auction donations, which helped raise money toward Bushie’s food costs, and much needed equipment repairs (sorry for those who experienced blown-out bags). Thank you to everyone who donated, and thank you to JV for the draft idea. The combination of the draft format and talent pool from all the new guys resulted in the most competitive tournament field we’ve had yet…more on this momentarily.

ROUND ROBIN

JV earned the rights to the #1 overall draft pick based on highest donation, and he promptly selected three-time runner-up, Barker. Clearly JV read my Kick-Off preview prior to making his selection (for those who didn’t read, Barker was my pick to win the tournament). JV’s selection was a good one, but it pissed KP off and motivated him all day to prove he was worthy of the #1 pick.

As previously mentioned, the competition in this tournament was the deepest we’ve had and evidence of that was in round robin play when Podunk Hopscotch Mafia (partnership of Adam and Rob) mushroom stamped JV and his “savior,” 21-3. KP overheard this result and talked a lot of shit, reminding JV of the player he should have taken at #1.

Style Crew (partnership of Paul G. and Steve-O) had Michigan Moose Knuckles (“MMK,” partnership of Ryan Harvey and KP) on the brink of an 0-1 round robin start as they took a commanding 17-6 lead. Paul, who was one of the best dressed on the day, came out slaying the Michigan Moose Knuckles and Steve-O calmly puffed his Mandingo cigar as he helped throw cornhole hay-makers at MMK. Ryan and KP finally got their heads together and ripped off a 14-3 run to tie the game at 20 before KP clinched the game by landing his final bag on the board for a 21-20 comeback win.

Caption: Paul, looking like a GQ model, watches Ryan in his Rey Mysterio mask and wonders what the fuck he signed up for.

Style Crew ultimately earned the #8 seed in bracket play, while MMK earned the #1 seed by going undefeated. Again, another example of the depth of competition when the #8 seed should have knocked off the #1 seed.

Back to Podunk Hopscotch Mafia (“PHM”), they used momentum from their win over JV and Barker to go 3-1 during pool play and earn the #2 seed. They looked great, and were a favorite to win the whole damn thing until Adam had to leave the tournament, crippling Mafia’s chances at a championship.

Los Tres Amigos (partnership of Gals, Mike McDonald and Jason S.) also played well during round robin action, going 3-2 overall. Jason was stuck with the last pick of the draft and had only Ace and Gary…errrr, Gals and Mike, as his choice. Los Tres Amigos was motivated to show the field they were a force to be reckoned with, and did so by earning the #4 seed.

One of the more disappointing performances of the day was from Dirty Mike & The Boys (partnership of Coach Mike and Justin), who looked like a very strong team, but landed at only the #6 seed after an up and down round robin display. Coach had his Bud Light Lime and back-handed taint tickler going, while Justin looked accurate and hilarious rocking his sombrero and Selena t-shirt. However, they couldn’t close games after taking leads late into every match.

Caption: Coach Mike watches Justin’s toss, wondering how to get his team back on track.

Bracket seeds based on round robin results were as follows:

#1 – Michigan Moose Knuckles (Ryan & KP) – First place Pool B
#2 – Podunk Hopscotch Mafia (Adam & Rob) – First place Pool A
#3 – Everybody Poops (JV & Barker) – Second place Pool A
#4 – Los Tres Amigos (Mike M., Gals and Jason) – Second place Pool B
#5 – Team Ramp (Paul & Bushie) – Third place Pool A
#6 – Dirty Mike & The Boys (Coach & Justin) – Fourth place Pool A
#7 – Avocado Buttholes (Dan & Matt) – Third place Pool B
#8 – Style Crew (Paul G. & Steve-O) – Fourth place Pool B
#9 – Derby de Mayo (Hugh & Erik) – Fifth place Pool A
#10 – No Show (Tory & Marco) – Fifth place Pool B

TOURNAMENT

The opening round of the tournament went chalk, with all favorites advancing besides #5 seed Team Ramp (partnership of Paul Teich and Bushie) knocking off #4 seed Los Tres Amigos. Sixth seeded Dirty Mike & The Boys couldn’t handle #3 seed Everybody Poops, despite KP’s strong rooting interest for Dirty Mike & The Boys.

Dirty Mike & The Boys continued their slide, facing elimination against Avocado Buttholes (partnership of Dan and Matt). But that’s when it seemed Dirty Mike & The Boys had found their groove, with Justin and Coach Mike plugging the Avocado Buttholes en route to a commanding 18-3 lead. However, not even Dirty Mike & The Boys could keep the Buttholes tamed as Dan shook free with 5 cornholes in 2 rounds to close the deficit. Ultimately, Coach Mike and Justin couldn’t regain their grip on the Avocado Buttholes and their tournament came to a premature end with a devastating loss.

Avocado Buttholes rode momentum from their huge comeback to a quarterfinals appearance before ultimately losing to Podunk Hopscotch Mafia. But their 4-3 overall tournament record as the #7 seed was very impressive.

Caption: Avocado Buttholes in action, eliminating Los Tres Amigos from the tournament.

Team Ramp lost the #1 vs. #5 match in the Winners Bracket to Michigan Moose Knuckles. But when Michigan Moose Knuckles lost to #3 seed Everybody Poops, they dropped to the Losers Bracket and faced a rematch with red hot Team Ramp, who had romped their way to two straight dominant wins in the Losers Bracket. Team Ramp avenged their first loss by beating MMK in the Losers Bracket. Bushie was on fire and Paul, decked out in his rainbow poncho, made timely cornholes to hold off MMK. All the sudden, the #1 seeded MMK had lost two in a row and faced elimination.

After a lot of chalk in the early rounds of the tournament, things had become crazy…#3 Everybody Poops and #5 Team Ramp played for a berth in the Championship match, while the #1, #2 and #4 seeds fought to avoid elimination in the Double Losers Bracket.

Team Ramp gave Everybody Poops all they could handle, but Everybody Poops continued to improve as the match went on and more beers were consumed, winning a close one to advance to the Championship match.

In the Double Losers Bracket, Michigan Moose Knuckles knocked off a tough Podunk Hopscotch Mafia team in the quarterfinals to earn one final rematch with Team Ramp, with the winner advancing to the Championship match. MMK won the rubber match with Team Ramp, eliminating Paul and Bushie after they had a great tournament run.

The Championship match featured #3 Everybody Poops vs. #1 Michigan Moose Knuckles, and MMK had an uphill battle needing three consecutive wins to claim The Cup, while Everybody Poops only had to win one match to take home the trophy.

Once again, Everybody Poops found themselves in an early deficit and had to battle from behind. Ryan and KP did their best to hold off Everybody Poops, but KP’s IPAs caught up to him and he was falling over the edge of the board on nearly half his throws. Barker and JV can handle their booze a lot better, and they were better players on this day, fighting back in match 1 to win 21-17 and claim the 2018 Preseason Kick-Off Tournament Championship.

Caption: Everybody Poops couldn’t be happier to claim The Cup.

Barker and JV played great in the tournament, going 6-0. The Championship meant a lot to both players, but especially to Barker who had finished the prior three tournaments as the runner-up. Both guys are worthy champions, and celebrated the moment in style by drinking from The Cup (see “Championship Drinks” link directly below).

Championship Drinks

They also showed class by giving respect to Michigan Moose Knuckles after the match, which is more than we can say about last year’s Kick-Off champions, Joe Mixon’s Domestic Abuse Hotline (Bert and JG).

Caption: The Champs give respect to the runners-up.

Caption: JV’s championship moment was reminiscent of Michael Jordan with the Larry O’Brien Trophy.

ALL-TOURNAMENT TEAM

The 2018 Preseason Kick-Off All-Tournament Team was voted by all players, and the top four players receiving votes were named to the All-Tournament Team. Coming as no surprise, both JV and Barker earned All-Tournament honors and they were joined by KP and Hugh. Hugh’s representation on the All-Tournament Team goes to show how strong of a player he is, earning respect from the rest of the field, despite his team, Derby de Mayo (partnership of Hugh and Erik Wolfe), earning the #9 seed and going 1-3 in tournament play.

Caption: 2018 Preseason Kick-Off All-Tournament Team.

The 2018 season has officially been kicked off, and we did it the right way. Thank you to all 19 guys who played and made this a fantastic day, and a competitive tournament. I hope to have all of you back for future tournaments, as well as the weekly regular season play.

MISCELLANEOUS PICTURES

Enjoy some pics from the rest of the day. Sorry I got hammered and stopped taking them as the day went on.

Caption: 19 deep before the day starts.

Caption: The last men standing…

Caption: KP says if you can’t beat ’em, join ’em.

The 2018 League of Extraordinary Gentlemen Preseason Kick-Off Tournament is less than 48 hours away, so it’s only appropriate that we take a deeper look into some intriguing storylines of the tournament.

NEW FACES

The 2018 Kick-Off will feature eight players who are making their LEG debut, and another three players who are playing in their first LEG tournament. In other words, over half the field will be making their tournament debut, which should make for significant drama and unpredictability.

The following players are making their debut:

1. Hugh Baldus (tournament debut)
2. Steve Berry (tournament debut)
3. Tory Brown (league debut)
4. Andrew Galczyk (league debut)
5. Paul Gergandellis (league debut)
6. Matt Kaas (league debut)
7. Justin Klausmeier (league debut)
8. Mike McDonald (league debut)
9. Rob Stahl (league debut)
10. Erik Wolfe (league debut)
11. Jason Stuhldreher (tournament debut)

We have no idea if the eight new guys can play, but in less than 48 hours at least one of them have a great chance to engrave their name in LEG history by taking home The Cup.

THE FAVORITES

JG (two-time LEG champion) took his talents to Austin, Texas in the off season and won’t be around to defend his 2017 Preseason Kick-Off title. Nick (one-time LEG champion) also won’t be playing in this tournament because he’s busy being a good father (unlike Dan, who always leaves his kids with his wife so he can hang with the boys…atta boy Danny!). Scott Garavalia and Bert (both one-time LEG champions) are also sitting out of this tournament. Therefore, the only prior LEG champion who will be in the 2018 Preseason Kick-Off field is Ryan Harvey. He has championship pedigree and knows what it takes to sip sweet victory out of The Cup.

The lack of prior champions not only makes the field wide open, it also makes Ryan Harvey one of the favorites to hoist the trophy again. When Ryan is rolling, he’s knocking in cornholes at a high clip. If Ryan finds that zone, he can carry any partner to a title.

Brent Barker also has to be mentioned among the favorites. Barker has helped lead each of his teams to the #1 overall seed and finished runner-up in all three prior LEG tournaments. He’s a dominant force, but hasn’t had enough at the end to take home a title. He is undoubtedly one of the guys with best odds to win the 2018 Preseason Kick-Off.

Lastly, KP is considered one of the favorites as the 2018 season approaches. He finished runner-up in the 2018 Postseason Championship (partnered with Barker) and has regularly been one of the top players in the league since inception. If he can stay sober-ish (tall task) by keeping his IPA intake under 15, he might be able to avoid choking in the final key matches of the tournament. The league founder and commissioner faces immense pressure to win one of these titles in order to establish his credibility. Will he collapse under that pressure, or can he rise to the occasion to finally win a title?

DARK HORSES

Every tournament we’ve had some guys elevate their performance to levels not previously seen, and it results in a deep tournament run. This year a few guys come to mind who have the talent to carry their partner all the way to The Cup.

Hugh Baldus is a young pup, having played in only four total LEG matches. However, Hugh has an intense competitive streak, and has flashed some serious cornhole skills that he honed tailgating at Indiana football games…yes folks, this guy ACTUALLY tailgated for Indiana football games. He’s that committed to boozing and cornhole. And if you need another reason why he’s a dark horse, the guy wears live cats as scarves (check out his profile pic). He’s a certified badass, and could be part of the last team standing.

JV (Jeff Valantas) was playing at an MVP-type level to close the 2017 season, and lost in the semifinals of the 2017 Postseason Tournament. If he picks up in 2018 where he left off in 2017, he’s a major threat to win this tournament. He has bowled double-digit 300 games, so pressure doesn’t bother him. Plus, he’s here for the goddamn party. He’ll make a legitimate run at Wade Boggs’ record for downing beers, except he doesn’t do it with shitty Miller Lite. JV pounds Labatt Blue Lights and tracks his count on a cut-off white t-shirt for everyone to see. There is no urban legend with JV, this guy is for real. Keep your eye on him Saturday.

Coach Mike hasn’t had much tournament success in his career, but if he’s in his zone with the back-handed taint tickler, Coach can beat ANYONE. The key to Coach’s success is focusing on his own game and not coaching his partner. Competition fuels him, and when he’s “on” there isn’t much anyone in the league can do about it. Will the 2018 Preseason Kick-Off be the tournament that cements Coach’s legacy as one of the LEG greats?

PREDICTION

This might be the most wide-open tournament we’ve had in history. With all the new unknown players, and prior champions not playing, this tournament is primed to be WILD with upsets…I’m talking bigger upsets than UMBC over Virginia.

That said, we can’t preview the tournament like this and not make a prediction. So, here it goes…a lot depends on partners and match-ups, but in the end Barker’s three prior runs to the championship match will pay major dividends in handling the pressure of playing deep into this tournament. Barker finally gets over the hump and hoists The Cup by winning the 2018 Preseason Kick-Off.

BONUS PREDICTION

Barker not only drinks a beer from The Cup, he becomes the first player in history to rip a Fireball shot from The Cup.

Saturday can’t come soon enough.