TROY, MICHIGAN – The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen have a special, sensual love for mothers. And, most mothers love the Gentlemen.
But, there is one mother who doesn’t love the Gentlemen and we certainly lost our love for her – Mother Nature. She’s been a bitch this season, raining out four weeks prior to tonight. One might think canceling four of 12 weeks would be enough to satisfy Her, but like most women, she’s never satisfied – thunderstorms cut this week short (a fifth week affected by rain), though we did enjoy a few hours of bags before taking cover.
Prior to the rainout, players were fighting blistering heat and chewy humidity. Yet somehow the boards were as fast as putting on the greens at a U.S. Open. The strange conditions were a big factor in most games going sideways this week. Of the 12 games played, 10 were decided by 9 points or more. Seven of those 10 blowouts saw the losing team score 8 points or fewer.
A small collection of players had no trouble with the conditions because they throw a softer bag with more touch on it – Drew, Austin and Roger.
- Drew posted the best KPM of the night at 23.9, which included a 4-1 record, 7.3 points per round (“PPR”), 79% accuracy and 2.1 cornholes per round (“CPR”). The highlight of his night was leading his team to victory while throwing a 9 PPR against Joe S. in Game 9
- Nobody could beat Austin this week. He finished 5-0 and cruised to wins in all of his head-to-head matchups. His 23.6 KPM was just behind Drew, as were his 7.2 PPR, 78% accuracy and 2.0 CPR. Austin walked into the backyard and the algorithm immediately pulled him into Game 2 before he had time to say hi to everyone. He proceeded to throw a 10.5 PPR with rounds of 12, 10, 10, and 10
- Roger rode the home-court advantage to a 3-1 record, 19.6 KPM, 6.1 PPR, 75% accuracy and 1.6 CPR. Roger’s only loss was to the dynamic duo of Drew and Ed, yet Roger still won the head-to-head matchup against Drew in that game. Roger is also one of the finalists for this week’s Mushroom Stamp Moment (more to come on that)
GAME OF THE NIGHT
All the blowouts limited Game of the Night consideration to two games. However, picking between those two games was very difficult. Game 4 earns this week’s honors, which featured Mike R. (or “Big Mike”) and Austin against Flowers and Drew.
After throwing a 10.5 PPR to start the night, Austin cooled off to start this match, throwing a measly 8.25 PPR across his first four rounds. Drew tried to keep pace during that stretch with a 6.75 PPR, but still gave up nine points. Big Mike added another four points against Flowers, helping build a 13-3 lead after eight rounds.
Austin and Big Mike were exceptional while earning a 10-point advantage, but they saw it all quickly unravel beginning with Flowers’ 7-2 win in the ninth round, narrowing the gap to 13-8.
Drew followed up with a 10-2 statement in the 10th round, and 8-4 advantage in the 12th round.
Big scoring runs are common in cornhole. But rarely does a team rip off a 17-1 run after being down 13-3 on the scoreboard. That is exactly what Flowers and Drew did – using a 17-1 run to snag a 20-14 lead.
Flowers was still hot and poised to close the match, throwing a 7-point round in the 13th round. This time Big Mike was up for the challenge, draining a 7-point round of his own to wash. Washing the round might not seem like an accomplishment, but in this case a wash equated to a win because of how badly Big Mike and Austin needed some positivity.
Austin promptly found his rhythm again en route to a 9-5 round in the 14th, putting his team right back in the game, down 20-18.
Big Mike and Flowers threw a 4-4 wash, each looking like they couldn’t wait to get the bags out off their hands because the pressure was too unbearable.
The tension was as thick as the humidity as Drew and Austin tried to deliver for their respective teams. Austin breathed a sigh of relief as his first bag found the hole. Drew seemed to attempt a block, but hung his bag too far right – good enough to serve as a bumper for Austin, but not quite out of play, enticing Drew to chase it.
Austin fired two more bags into the hole, forcing Drew to desperately attempt bringing his first bag back into play (and into the hole). Sadly, he side-railed one bag and boarded two more while trying to execute a miracle shot. Austin won the round 9-3 to clinch the win and avoid his team logging a “choke” (they had a 13-3 lead, so would have earned a “choke” had they blown that 10-point lead and lost).
The head-to-head match-ups were awesome – Big Mike and Flowers ended up dead even for the game, while Austin held a +0.5 differential per round (“DPR”) against Drew (7.13 PPR vs. 6.63 PPR).
MUSHROOM STAMP MOMENT
The Mushroom Stamp Moment (“MSM”) occurred in the only other competitive game of the night – Game 8, pitting Joe S. and KP against Paul and Roger.
The scoreboard showed a 15-12 advantage for Paul and Roger, then Joe dropped an 8-1 round on Paul for a lead change, 19-15. Cue Roger for some home court cooking – he steadied the ship with an 8-5 round over KP, cutting the deficit to 19-18.
Paul tied it, 19-19, by winning the next round 7-6…but nobody really cares about that. 
Roger jumped in the phone booth, ditched his clothes and glasses, squeezed into his leotard, flipped on his cape and burst out of the phone booth faster than a speeding bullet. His silky throw sent all four bags into the bottom of the hole with ease, as if he walked them 30 feet and dropped them in from point blank range. KP was helpless, and felt it, while throwing an 8-point round.
Roger’s four-bagger to win, combined with his 8-5 round that calmed his team down after yielding a gut-wrenching 8-1 round, earns this week’s Mushroom Stamp Moment.
This week’s box score is below.
| Week 9 Power Rank | Name | Week 9 Wins | Week 9 Losses | Week 9 Win % | Week 9 Saves | Week 9 Chokes | Week 9 Comebacks | Week 9 KPM | Week 9 Gross Points Per Round | Week 9 Toss Accruacy | Week 9 Cornholes Per Round | Week 9 Cornholes | Week 9 Cornholes Per Game | Week 9 Gross Points | Week 9 Gross Points Per Game | Week 9 Net Points For | Week 9 Net Points Against | Week 9 Net Points For Per Game | Week 9 Net Points Against Per Game | Week 9 Net Point Differential | Week 9 Foot Snags |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Drew | 4 | 1 | 80% | 4 | - | - | 23.9 | 7.3 | 79% | 2.1 | 60 | 12.0 | 212 | 42.4 | 104 | 44 | 20.8 | 8.8 | 12.0 | 0 |
| 2 | Austin | 5 | 0 | 100% | 5 | - | - | 23.6 | 7.2 | 78% | 2.0 | 53 | 10.6 | 187 | 37.4 | 105 | 48 | 21.0 | 9.6 | 11.4 | 0 |
| 3 | Joe S. | 1 | 2 | 33% | 1 | - | - | 20.4 | 6.4 | 80% | 1.6 | 30 | 10.0 | 121 | 40.3 | 47 | 52 | 15.7 | 17.3 | (1.7) | 0 |
| 4 | Ed | 3 | 2 | 60% | 2 | - | - | 20.2 | 6.2 | 71% | 1.7 | 42 | 8.4 | 155 | 31.0 | 72 | 64 | 14.4 | 12.8 | 1.6 | 0 |
| 5 | KP | 2 | 3 | 40% | 2 | - | - | 19.7 | 6.1 | 73% | 1.6 | 48 | 9.6 | 183 | 36.6 | 83 | 74 | 16.6 | 14.8 | 1.8 | 0 |
| 6 | Roger | 3 | 1 | 75% | 1 | - | - | 19.6 | 6.1 | 75% | 1.6 | 34 | 8.5 | 134 | 33.5 | 70 | 53 | 17.5 | 13.3 | 4.3 | 0 |
| 7 | Paul G. | 1 | 3 | 25% | - | - | - | 19.0 | 5.9 | 73% | 1.5 | 36 | 9.0 | 142 | 35.5 | 49 | 82 | 12.3 | 20.5 | (8.3) | 0 |
| 8 | Erik | 1 | 3 | 25% | 1 | - | - | 15.3 | 4.8 | 63% | 1.2 | 23 | 5.8 | 96 | 24.0 | 42 | 66 | 10.5 | 16.5 | (6.0) | 0 |
| 9 | Mike R. | 2 | 2 | 50% | 2 | - | - | 13.9 | 4.4 | 60% | 1.0 | 21 | 5.3 | 92 | 23.0 | 49 | 72 | 12.3 | 18.0 | (5.8) | 0 |
| 10 | Coach Mike | 1 | 3 | 25% | 1 | - | - | 10.7 | 3.3 | 41% | 0.8 | 16 | 4.0 | 63 | 15.8 | 36 | 75 | 9.0 | 18.8 | (9.8) | 0 |
| 11 | Flowers | 1 | 4 | 20% | 1 | - | - | 10.0 | 3.1 | 39% | 0.8 | 21 | 4.2 | 84 | 16.8 | 61 | 88 | 12.2 | 17.6 | (5.4) | 0 |