BEVERLY HILLS, MICHIGAN – Anyone who has played one week, or one tournament, of LEG quickly realizes the outrageousness with JV. Wise cracks, outbursts, and an occasional drop of his pants to moon his opponent because they scored too many points (while also showing off his heavy, low-hanging nuts) are standard, harmless occurrences from JV.
However, a handful of us who’ve been around since LEG inception know of an escalated level JV used reach. Things like shitting his pants in the middle of a game, then tossing his dirty, soiled drawers over the fence into Bushie’s neighbor’s yard. Or growing so frustrated from not being able to throw a bag on the board from 27 feet that he blindly launches a full beer into the air, that somehow navigated two trees and landed on KP’s head, spraying beer all over KP’s laptop.
And those things happened in back-to-back weeks during the 2017 campaign. Please, enjoy a trip down memory lane:
While those instances were in fact pretty wild, JV has steadily calmed down over the last eight years, at least when compared to his prior reference point…he certainly isn’t calm compared to most of the other league members.
Despite a relatively “clean” run the past eight years, things started down a dark path again this week – not quite like forgetting one’s daily dose of Metamucil and suddenly finding yourself dumping diarrhea on your neighbor’s tree because you couldn’t make it home from a walk with the dog…but close.
JV started the night well, winning his first match while throwing 5.5 points per round (“PPR”). But after that he lost two consecutive games before he was saved by the rain cancellation, otherwise things could have continued to spiral.
During the rain delay, JV was so frustrated with his game and the most recent loss with Bushie as his partner, that he ripped one of his teeth out while deepthroating a bunless coney dog in front of the whole group. Was this an attempt to motivate himself to play better? An intimidation tactic? Nobody is sure, other than we can confidently say it involved the old level of JV craziness.
GAME OF THE NIGHT
Mother Nature limited us to only eight games this week, robbing us of another fun-filled Thursday night. At some point we need her to cooperate and stop dealing us rain delays and rain cancellations.
Without much to choose from, this week’s Game of the Night leads us to Game 3 with Erik and Mike V. squaring off against Paul G. and Bushie. While this wasn’t a David vs. Goliath contest, it was one you’d expect Paul and Bushie to handle considering they are #11 and #20, respectively, in the Power Rankings, compared to #18 and #22, respectively, for Erik and Mike V.
Yet, Erik out-punted his coverage to start this match, averaging 6 PPR while logging rounds of 3, 10, 3 and 8 points. That was enough to limit Paul to just a one point advantage during that stretch, a critical factor in the game plan to pull an upset.
On the other end, Mike V. bested Bushie during that stretch by seven points, helping his team to a 15-9 lead after eight rounds.
As is often the case for underdogs, all it takes is a momentary lack of focus leaving the door cracked just enough for the favorites to kick it in. In the 11th round Paul continued throwing well, while Erik slipped up just enough, giving way to an enormous 10-2 round. Paul’s eight points surged his team to a 17-15 lead.
Bushie added another point, upping the lead to 18-15.
All the sudden, nerves overpowered all four players, shifting a well-played game to a temporary stinker.
- Erik allowed a prime chance to slip through his fingers. Paul missed all four of his bags off the board in the 12th round. Yet Erik only managed to score two bags on the board, cutting his team’s deficit to 18-17
- In the 13th round Mike V. had a chance to clinch victory simply by boarding his final bag. Instead he missed, settling for a 3-0 round win (his team took a 20-18 lead). The flip side is Bushie could have also capitalized on Mike’s three bags on the board, but did not score any of his four bags
- The 14th round somehow regressed, with Paul scoring one point on a 2-1 advantage over Erik. Again, both players squandered excellent opportunities to win the game, and both choked.
- Bushie finally ended the misery in the 15th round with an anti-climactic 4-1 advantage, winning the game 21-20.
This really was an excellent match for 75% of the rounds. However, the final four rounds (two for each player) were hard to watch. I’m not trying to be negative, but consider the following statistics during the ugly final four rounds:
- Erik – threw 8 bags and only scored on 3 of them, no cornholes
- Paul – threw 8 bags and only scored on 2 of them, no cornholes
- Mike V. – threw 8 bags and only scored on 2 of them, one cornhole
- Bushie – threw 8 bags and only scored on 4 of them (all four scored in the final round to win the match), no cornholes
MUSHROOM STAMP MOMENT
After shitting on the four guys involved in the Game of the Night, it’s time to end on a positive note.
In Game 1, Flowers and KP matched up with JV and Paul. After struggling the last few weeks, KP started red-hot this week, throwing rounds of 8, 8, 10, 8 and 10 to begin Game 1 (that’s an 8.8 average PPR). However, this only produced four net points because Paul was also on a heater, throwing rounds of 7, 4, 8, 12 and 9 (an 8.0 average PPR). 
Paul battled, hanging in while taking some of KP’s best stuff. He was rewarded with an opportunity to win the game in the 13th round when KP missed an aggressive attempt to collect a low blocker bag.
Paul kept control of the middle board, while forcing KP into heroics, and it paid off in the form of a 10-4 round win, giving his team a 21-11 victory.
Paul earns this week’s Mushroom Stamp Moment (“MSM”) for throwing fire and not giving up much during KP’s onslaught. Then he delivered the knockout blow in the 13th round.
This week’s box score is below.
| Week 5 Power Rank | Name | Week 5 Wins | Week 5 Losses | Week 5 Win % | Week 5 Saves | Week 5 Chokes | Week 5 Comebacks | Week 5 KPM | Week 5 Gross Points Per Round | Week 5 Toss Accruacy | Week 5 Cornholes Per Round | Week 5 Cornholes | Week 5 Cornholes Per Game | Week 5 Gross Points | Week 5 Gross Points Per Game | Week 5 Net Points For | Week 5 Net Points Against | Week 5 Net Points For Per Game | Week 5 Net Points Against Per Game | Week 5 Net Point Differential | Week 5 Foot Snags |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | KP | 2 | 1 | 67% | 2 | - | - | 22.4 | 6.9 | 80% | 1.9 | 37 | 12.3 | 138 | 46.0 | 53 | 42 | 17.7 | 14.0 | 3.7 | 0 |
| 2 | Paul G. | 4 | 0 | 100% | 3 | - | - | 20.5 | 6.4 | 76% | 1.7 | 38 | 9.5 | 146 | 36.5 | 84 | 37 | 21.0 | 9.3 | 11.8 | 0 |
| 3 | Matt H. | 3 | 0 | 100% | 3 | - | - | 20.1 | 6.3 | 79% | 1.6 | 28 | 9.3 | 113 | 37.7 | 63 | 33 | 21.0 | 11.0 | 10.0 | 0 |
| 4 | Joe S. | 2 | 2 | 50% | 2 | - | - | 18.6 | 5.8 | 75% | 1.4 | 34 | 8.5 | 140 | 35.0 | 64 | 59 | 16.0 | 14.8 | 1.3 | 0 |
| 5 | JV | 1 | 2 | 33% | 1 | - | - | 17.1 | 5.4 | 73% | 1.3 | 25 | 8.3 | 108 | 36.0 | 37 | 53 | 12.3 | 17.7 | (5.3) | 0 |
| 6 | Erik | 1 | 2 | 33% | 1 | - | - | 16.9 | 5.4 | 75% | 1.2 | 19 | 6.3 | 86 | 28.7 | 52 | 42 | 17.3 | 14.0 | 3.3 | 0 |
| 7 | Mike V. | 1 | 3 | 25% | 1 | - | - | 12.7 | 4.2 | 66% | 0.8 | 15 | 3.8 | 83 | 20.8 | 52 | 74 | 13.0 | 18.5 | (5.5) | 0 |
| 8 | Bushie | 2 | 2 | 50% | 1 | - | - | 12.6 | 4.0 | 59% | 0.9 | 22 | 5.5 | 105 | 26.3 | 59 | 72 | 14.8 | 18.0 | (3.3) | 0 |
| 9 | Flowers | 0 | 4 | 0% | - | - | - | 11.1 | 3.6 | 58% | 0.7 | 15 | 3.8 | 83 | 20.8 | 32 | 84 | 8.0 | 21.0 | (13.0) | 0 |